Homeward Bound

New Home & Book

2008-04-22T14:37:00.001-07:00

Well, there have been a lot of changes around my life in this last year. I know some of you have probably gotten lost in the shuffle, but if you're interested, I'll give you a GREAT reason to jump on over to my new home.

It is the blog for my publishing house, Spirit Light Books. You can go to www.spiritlightbooks.com to sign up for the new blog (it will come to you just like this one did and feature me in addition to some other awesome authors!).

As a thank you for making the jump, you will get a free Staci Stallings' e-book that is brand new to the whole world.

Fellow Spirit Light author, Dennis Bates says of the new e-book Deep in the Heart, "When Maggie moved into the mansion, so did I. I found myself feeling and seeing what she felt and saw and Ms. Stalling's seamless story telling and dialogue carried me through this book in one sitting, keeping me in my chair until I finished it. This is real romance, full of faith and encouragement with real characters. Bravo!"

Deep in the Heart follows the story of Maggie Montgomery, a young woman fresh out of college who takes a job being the nanny for Conrad Ayers, a billionaire oilman, in Houston. Although clinging to God to keep her from being completely overwhelmed, Maggie's got secrets which could get her thrown right off the premises just when life is starting to look livable again. Then she meets the estate handyman who's got some secrets of his own...

To sign up for the blog and to get the free e-book, just go to: http://www.spiritlightbooks.com and fill out the short form at the top.

Thank you so much for following me this far! Your support and encouragement mean more than you will ever know!

Peace,
Staci

My Absence

2007-04-10T09:05:00.000-07:00

You've probably noticed I haven't posted in a while. My last post was on March 30, 2007 the day my life changed. My older brother who had been battling what we thought was depression for almost two years had just been diagnosed as bi-polar. We were grapling with this new diagnosis, trying to figure out what it meant for him and his family going forward. He too, was struggling, seeing life as he had known it spiraling away from him. In the early morning hours of March 30, he gave up the struggle and took his own life.

To say these last two weeks have been traumatic would be an understatement. The grief and heartache at first were overwhelming for my family and for his wife and kids. As we progressed through the week--with seven individual wake services for him, the love that was expressed to my family was incredible. Some who approached me said, "I'm sorry." Some said, "You have my sympathy." Most simply said, "I love you." It was what I told my mom and dad when I called them after finding out on Friday. "I love you."

I ask your prayers for my family, my mom and dad, my brother's wife and kids, for my sister and her family, my family, and his in-laws and friends. It has been a difficult time for all as we sort out what went wrong, why nothing we did or tried worked, and how and where we go from here. It is one of those times in life that I become very grateful for the amazing friends and family that I have. They never let me forget that I am loved, and that is making all the difference.

Tell someone today... RIGHT NOW that you love them. They need to know, and you might not have tomorrow to tell them.

Peace to all,

Staci Stallings

Lessons at the 11th & a Half Hour

2007-03-30T04:20:00.000-07:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2002

Learning is not for the faint of heart. Just ask the thousands of students who are trying to learn but just not getting it. They aren't bad kids. They aren't stupid. For some reason there are certain points for which they need more help.

However, because it seems like they aren't trying, no one helps them, and they begin to believe (erroneously) that they really are the problem.

Parents who see their children slamming into these types of obstacles in school usually choose to employ one of two tactics: 1) Look the other way and hope for the best, or 2) Ground the child and punish, punish, punish until the child relents and changes his or her ways or fails entirely. As a former teacher and current parent, I can tell you with almost perfect certainty: Neither of these approaches works.

Although also true in the realm of peer pressure and friends, this is especially true when it comes to schoolwork. Many parents are at a loss, however, to figure out alternative measures to get their kids turned around and headed in the right direction when something goes awry. Even parents who really care often become frustrated when threats and punishment don't work. How do I know? Because I have the immense honor of being an aunt to a great kid who taught me just that.

A few years back this young man was enrolled in a Freshman Honors English course. Unfortunately his teacher believed that because the kids were "honors," that meant that she could give them work, and they could do it-with no teaching required. Now this young man was a smart kid, but English was not his best subject. Further, he had never bothered to learn grammar. When he got into this class, the teacher gave worksheet after worksheet in which the student had to identify the classification-noun, verb, adjective, adverb-of each word. He tried, but with no further instruction and lacking a good background in this process, he was stuck. When he asked for help, the teacher told him she didn't have time. Neither Mom nor Dad knew how to help him, and so for a whole semester he floundered.

Then two days before the final, facing a grounding from Mom and Dad not to mention summer school, he came to see me. I suppose I was a last-ditch effort. In fact, I don't think he really thought it would do any good.

So it was at the 11th and a half hour that we started over at the beginning. Did he know that every the, a, and an were adjectives? No. He had no idea. Bam. Thirty points in the plus column on every paper without more than ten seconds of teaching. Every sentence has a noun and a verb. Find those two next. Bam. Another twenty points. And so it went.

We worked two hours the first night, four more hours the next day. At the end of the second day, I asked him, "When we started, what did you think you would make?" "A 20 if I got really lucky." "And now?" "Now, I will be hacked off if I don't get a 90."

A 20 to a 90 in four hours-after he had spent a whole semester being frustrated. Needless to say, he passed the test with enough points to get him un-grounded and out of summer school. Truth is, he never had to be in that position in the first place, but it got to that point because the teacher wasn't helping and his parents didn't know how to help. My question now is: How many other students out there are in this same position? How many are simply giving up on themselves and on life? How many give up and take the grounding-believing that it really is their fault? In my mind, one is too many.

We need to find a way to help these kids before the 11th and a half hour. We need to find a way to help them before we jump to the conclusion that they are just not trying. Parents, teachers, people who care. We need to find a way to help them. Period.

*~*~*
Check out Staci's website. http://www.stacistallings.com You'll feel better for the experience!

Let's Compare . . . or not!

2007-03-28T06:20:00.000-07:00

I'd like to welcome my special guest, Tricia Goyer, with thoughts I needed to hear today!

(c) Tricia Goyer

Today, do you feel discouraged? Do you see others having success at all levels and wonder when it will be your turn?

We all know we are special creations, unique and precious to God. Yet why do we struggle with comparing our lives, our bodies, our kids, our talents (or lack of talents) with others?

I do this with my writing. I look at the best-seller's list with longing. I consider the "big" advances and media fan-fare that some authors receive, and sigh.

I do this with myself. How come my friend can eat anything she wants and stay slim? Why do I have to walk and watch what I eat just to maintain?

I do this with so many areas of my life, "How come?" "What if?" "Why?"

In reality, we (me included) need to look past who we "dream" to be and consider God's dreams instead.

In God's word, we read: "God-of-the-Angel-Armies speaks: 'Exactly as I planned, it will happen. Following my blueprints, it will take shape," says Isaiah 14:24 (The Message).

The word "planned" here is translated "compare." It's as if God has weighed the different possibilities, looked at them from all angles, and then chose the best way.

He makes the blueprints . . . then He constructs them into our reality. The life we have is the one constructed for us. It's not the life, body, health, or circumstances we wished we'd had. Or the perfect life we can never attain. But the blueprints and the form He is transforming into reality.

"Remember your history, your long and rich history. I am God, the only God you've had or ever will have-from the beginning telling you what the ending will be, all along letting you in on what is going to happen, amazing you," we read in Isaiah 46:10-11. "I'm in this for the long haul, I'll do exactly what I set out to do." (The Message)

It's okay to have longings. But even before we worry about what we desire for our lives, the first step is to not let our dreams motivate us, but instead let His.

God has longings for us even greater than we imagine, and He's willing to tell us these things as we seek Him out.

Will you seek Him today? Pray. Open your heart. And dare to listen to God's dreams for you.

*~*~*
Looking for a great read? Check out Tricia's new book, A Valley of Betrayal, at: http://www.triciagoyer.com/ "The words we write can make a difference in transforming our world. Our difference in the world can equally transform our words." --Tricia Goyer

My Timing is Perfect

2007-03-27T04:50:00.000-07:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2003

"Make me know Thy ways, O Lord; Teach me Thy paths."
--Psalm 25:4

There are days when I get really frustrated with man's place in religion. It probably has to do with how and where I was brought up. In a little town with only one church and one faith practiced, I didn't often see the edge of the power of change that the hierarchy of a religious community can wield. Church was the same; believers were the same; God was the same no matter where I went. That's probably why all the changes the Church is making now upset me so much. Growing up, my religion was as solid as my faith. Now, however, I realize that the ideal I had always believed in back then simply does not exist.

No, in this world people want excitement and challenge. One way to stir excitement is by making changes. Make a change, and suddenly everyone is compelled to take a stand on the issue-for and against. The hierarchy then gains power by holding fast to the change they have decreed. Eventually the multitudes surrender to the change, which confirms who has the power. Until, of course, someone new comes along and needs to make a change to reassert power, and the whole process repeats itself.

In the last few years, my religion has gone through many changes. We've been told that instead of kneeling at one part of the service, we are now to stand (then we went back to kneeling). We've been told that instead of only receiving Communion on the tongue it is now acceptable even encouraged to receive by hand. We've been told that children should no longer be Confirmed at 15 when they are able to make their own choice, it is now better to have them make their Confirmations as 8-year-olds because Confirmation cannot be "learned or earned."

Of course my mind which had to study for a year to be able to pass the test on the religious teachings of the church in order to "earn" Confirmation wonders how we have suddenly gone so far in the other direction. This concern was intensified when my eight-year-old daughter arrived at this juncture of her life. I had hoped and prayed, literally, that the rules would be changed back-as some had said they might be. However, during our first meeting for second grade parents, we found out it was not to be. The second graders would be Confirmed as per the decree of the hierarchy.

For weeks I vacillated between fury and bewilderment. I didn't understand why the religion I had grown up with looked so different than the one I was passing on to my child. I argued with people, asking why this change was made, and what my options were in going forward. I couldn't figure out how I could ever be at peace with myself if I took the central decision of my life away from my child. But I also couldn't figure out how I would be at peace if it was God's will and I stood in the way of that.

Then one night after a meeting, my heart hurt so badly that I was near tears. I held my daughter's hand as she drifted off to sleep and looking at her, I finally begged God, "Please, I don't understand this. I know You know that I want what's best for her, and I know what's best for Her is Your will. Please help me to know what that is, and help me to be at peace with whatever happens."

Instantly a voice in my head said very patiently, "My timing is perfect for each child. She is Mine, give her to Me, and whatever happens will be what I had envisioned for her." With tears rolling down my face, I did just that. I let go of the control I had been gripping so tightly. For the first time, I had true peace about not just Confirmation but about her whole life.

She's God's child, and God will guide her life the way it is supposed to go. I'm God's child too, and God's timing, if I let it be, will always be perfect for me just as it will be for all of us-no matter what changes men make in the rules.

*~*

Stay tuned tomorrow for Tricia Goyer!

You Can Come To Me

2007-03-25T05:49:00.000-07:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

The sitcom set-up was easy enough. In fact, I could follow it while carrying on an in depth conversation with a friend of mine about the amazing love of the Holy Spirit. The set-up amounted to this: The father, a widower, was being pressured into "getting on with his life." Realizing that he was hanging on, he decided his friends were right, and he took off his wedding ring. He determined to go on the date. As he was on the date, however, his two young daughters, upset by the thought of their father dating again, got into a fight and inadvertently knocked the wedding ring down the sink.

In true sitcom fashion the situation quickly deteriorated all the way to the two girls trying to take the sink apart to get the ring out. Of course, by the time anyone found them, the bathroom was flooded and there was a huge mess. At about that time, my conversation with my friend wound to a close, and we stood to go into the television room. The show had come to the high point. The father sat down with the oldest girl, and he said, "You know you can come to me with anything."

With her head down, the young girl says sadly, "I know I should've come to you right away, but I panicked."

Isn't that exactly what God says to each of us? He wants us to come in our most difficult times. In fact, He wants us to come before we've flooded the bathroom and made a real mess of things. He wants us to trust His love enough to be able to come to Him and let Him help us. However, too often, we are like the young daughter, "I know I should've come to you right away, but I panicked."

Don't panic. He loves you, and He wants to help. Go to Him. Tell Him what happened. He won't get mad. He won't throw you out of His house on your ear. No. He won't. Remember the parable of the Prodigal Son? He will be so glad you turned around and came back, He won't even let you get through your carefully prepared speech about what you should've done, could've done, would've done... He loves you so much He'll throw His arms around you and throw a party!

In Him, you've got an ally like no other. Don't panic. He's on your side. He wants to help. The only question is, will you let Him before you've made a total mess of things? It's your choice.

~*~
Tricia Goyer will be Staci's special guest Wednesday, March 28th. Stay tuned!

Being a Magi

2007-03-20T04:26:00.000-07:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2006

A long time ago I read a book that said, "There is a reason you notice the things you notice. They come into your sight to tell you something." (paraphrase) I took that to heart and began actively noticing. That is, I notice when I notice something. Rather than going through life oblivious to the signs God is putting in my path, I either actively seek them or at least I get it with only a couple of occurrences.

Much like the man in the flood who was standing on his porch as a boat went by. The people in the boat told him he could come with them. He shook his head. "God will save me if He wants to save me." Several hours past, and now he was hanging onto an upstairs window. A second boat came by. The people in it said, "Come on with us!" But the man replied, "No, I love God, and if He wants to save me, He will."

Hours past, and it grew dark. A Coast Guard boat with a search light found the man clinging to his chimney. "Come on! Get on!" they yelled. But the man refused. "I love God, and if He wants to save me, He will." An hour later the man appeared at the Pearly Gates.

St. Peter looked at him incredulously. "What are you doing here?" The man shrugged. "I guess it was my time. God didn't save me." To which St. Peter said, "That's weird. We sent three boats!"

After I heard this story, I once heard Oprah Winfrey say something similar. She said (paraphrase), "To get your attention, God will send a breath. Then He will send a pebble, then a brick, then a boulder, then the whole house will come crashing down!"

Let me just say, for myself, I prefer to catch what God's telling me at the first boat, the breath, or at most the pebble. So, I am very conscious of the messages God sends to me. And they are everywhere!

In music, books, the Bible, conversations, on billboards, in magazines, sometimes even in dreams. Recently I've been preparing a project that is very close to my heart for which God has given many signs and messages since it was first conceived. For this one project I have received messages ranging from videos depicting the story, songs, email messages, and even a tour bus following me down the road!

The ultimate (so far) message was that just before I mailed the project in, I was praying over it in the Post Office, and my oldest daughter said, "Look, Mom." When I opened my eyes, she was holding a piece of paper about five inches from me in my direct line of sight. It said, "Your talents will be recognized and suitably rewarded." I just started laughing because I get signs and messages, but most of the time they take at least a little bit of interpretation.

As I was recounting these events to my sister, she laughed. "You are such a Magi." To which I said the only logical thing, "Huh?"

She went on to explain. "The Magi were astronomers. They spent their time looking for signs in the sky, signs of a new king, signs of a shift on the earth begun in the heavens. That's what you do!"

I'd never thought of it quite like that, but I've got to say, it's great fun to be a Magi. You should try it sometime.

*~*~*
Looking for a great read? Come on over to Staci's site and check out the first three chapters of her two latest books at: http://www.stacistallings.com/Previews.htm You'll feel better for the experience!

128

2007-03-09T04:23:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2004

Funny how God sets things up-even when we don't take the time to notice. My biggest concern was leaving my children for three days to go on the retreat.

Now, I knew they would survive three days without me. I also knew they were in good hands. That wasn't the point. The point was that I wanted to be there to put them to sleep, to wake them up, to sit in the chair and snuggle with them every morning. I wanted to hold them and remind them that I love them just in case they had forgotten since the last time I told them. Instead here I was missing them and wondering how I would ever make it three days without them.

I was at peace, knowing that God would keep them for me, but I still knew I would miss not having them right there with me. I went anyway, heavy heart and all.

When I got the key to my room, I dutifully memorized the number even as I carried and walked with my kids down the hall so they could see where Mommy was going to stay. 128. 128. 128. Stefani's hand in mine. Andrew in my arms. Kayla holding onto my pantleg. Together, we all stepped into the room, looked around, and then it was time to go.

The evening passed. We separated as I kissed them. After a few activities, we were allowed to go back to our rooms. I took out my key and saw "128" stamped on it.

128. Why did that number sound so familiar and why had I been assigned that room and not say 122. I've come to know that when I notice something like that, it's usually because God's trying to give me a message through it. I had noticed, so I knew there was a message there that God was trying to point out to me.

As I looked at the key, I thought, "Huh, Stefani is 8. Maybe that's why it sounds so familiar." Then I looked a little closer. " Andrew's one! One and eight. Andrew and Stefani, but where's Kayla?"

Number sense training kicked in at that point. I knew there was a 5 there somewhere, but that 2 was all wrong. Then I saw it.

1 + 2 = 3 and 8 - 3 = You guessed it! FIVE!

So I got the right room. I know because God gave me the key I needed to hold onto all weekend. It was a nice reminder that He's watching out for all of us-me and my kids. If we ever doubt that, I know without question that He will put a key in our hand to remind us.

~*~
Peace to all! Have a safe Spring Break! Remember to spring forward your clocks!

Staci

Rainbows

2007-03-07T04:14:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

I've always loved rainbows, so this lesson was a little hard for me to learn. A few friends and I got together to sing-one of my favorite things to do. One of the songs we pulled out was about chasing rainbows. It said in effect that we're all just chasing pretty rainbows, but as pretty as they are, when we get there, they aren't what we thought they would be. Of course in the literal world, this is true. If you've ever tried to capture a rainbow, you know you can drive forever and never catch it. It changes, it moves, and then it disappears.

The concept of chasing pretty rainbows stayed with me as we continued to practice this song over the next several weeks, and I began to see how many rainbows I had been chasing. There was the rainbow of publication. The rainbow of success. The rainbow of achievement. The rainbow of others' approval and acceptance. Sometimes I got close. Sometimes I actually swiped my hand right through one. But always they would change, move, and then disappear.

Nearly instantly a new rainbow would appear on the vast plain of my life, and I would think, "Oh, I get it. It wasn't THIS rainbow that I really wanted at all. It was THAT one. Now if I can just figure out a way to get over there, then I'll be happy."

We all know about these rainbows. One is called education. If I just get through high school, then I'll be happy. If I just go to college, if I just get my masters, if I just, if I just... Then those rainbows start looking pale, and new rainbows appear. If I could just meet the man of my dreams, then life would be fabulous forever. Then it moves. If we could just get married... Again it moves. If we could just have kids... If he would just get this job, if I could just stay home, if we could just make enough to afford, if things weren't so busy, if we can just get through Christmas, if I just had enough work, if I didn't have so much work... Always those rainbows move.

First they are to the right and then to the left, backward, forward. But somehow those rainbows are never right here. Father Robert Barron? Calls it being scattered, and that's a very good word for it. Wherever you are, over there always looks better. Most frustratingly, sometimes over there is in several different places at once. You scramble, and you scrape to reach that other rainbow so life will get better.

The truth is all of those rainbows are illusions. Getting a rainbow will never make life better. The only way life gets better is to have the Maker of the Rainbows with you right now. When you have Him, chasing rainbows that the world says are important becomes far less important to the point of non-existent. You realize that the rainbows will not make you happy. In fact they keep you frustrated and scattered as long as you believe they are the treasure you are searching for. Only He can bring you the peace you are so desperate to find.

Chapter Verse tells the story of the man who found a great treasure in a field. He went and sold all he owned so he could buy that field. The truth is the great treasure is Christ, and giving up all you own involves giving up striving for all those things the world says you have to have, all those pretty rainbows. The only true rainbow is the Rainbow Maker. So seek Him first, and all the other rainbows you most need will be added unto you. The best part is they will not require vast amounts of effort to reach. They will be "added" to your life.

It will be as if your whole life is filled with rainbows you never stopped long enough to really notice. The rainbows of the world are as smoke-inconsequential and hollow. The rainbows of God are real and eternal.

So which kind of rainbow do you have right now? Which one do you want?

~*~
Visit Staci's website, http://www.stacistallings.com You'll feel better for the experience!

Just for You

2007-03-02T06:08:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

We noticed the moon on our way to our vacation spot. It was hard not to notice it. It was like an eclipse without being an eclipse. There was only a sliver of the shiny part like a lopsided smile at the bottom. However, the outline of the entire orb was clearly visible. Very cool indeed.

Now, normally I don't make it a point to notice the moon. Occasionally, if it's interesting - orange, for example - I do see it. And honestly, I see it more than I give myself credit for. It's just I'd never noticed that I noticed. You can be sure that I will for forever after this weekend.

You see, God sent me five and a half hours away from home and set it up just so He could show how much He loves me and make me smile at the same time. While on vacation we attended a small church in a tiny community. The readings were ones God had pointed out to me over the past few weeks, which was cool.

Then the priest got up to give the sermon. He began talking about how God doesn't just want service from us. He wants a personal relationship with each one of us.

Strange how that was the exact message of everything I'd been reading. Then he said something that really surprised me. He said, "It's like the moon. Do you realize that God put the moon right there just for you."

It's like God saying, "Hi there!" in the sky. I look at the moon and frankly a lot of things differently now.

Thanks God, for that lesson - five and a half hours from home.

~*~
Check out Staci's Shoutlife page: http://www.shoutlife.com/stacistallings You'll feel better for the experience!

The GOOD News!

2007-02-27T10:00:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, Feb. 26, 2007

I finally get it. Okay, it took me a while, but I finally understand why the Gospel is called "The Good News." This morning my church burned to the ground. Thankfully, the adjacent building was saved because of the awesome fire department, but the sanctuary is a total loss. At approximately 5:30 this morning the roof caved in, and everything that wasn't already destroyed by the fire was demolished. Interestingly as I sat and watched the building I have grown to so love burn to the ground, I couldn't help but be so grateful for The GOOD News I have learned there, and The GOOD News is this...

This is Friday, pure and simple. Friday was full of anguish and mourning as Christ carried that cross up the hill and was nailed there for all to see. It wouldn't have been good news if that had been the end. If that had been the end, suffering and mourning like today would have been all we could have done. That would have been anything but good news. Ah! But that wasn't the end, and thus it is truly The GOOD News! Because of the gift given us by our Gracious and Loving God, we know... we KNOW that even in the depths of the pain of Friday... Sunday's coming. Sunday, the Resurrection, Christ glorified is coming! And so even in the midst of sorrow for the old, even in the midst of the pain of saying good-bye to what was, we know that what is coming is infinitely better than we ever could have imagined! Now, let me tell you, on a day like today, THAT is GOOD News!

So, if you are suffering through a Friday in your life. If yet another bill has found its way into your mailbox, if yet again you haven't made the sales you had hoped, if yet again you are left to mourn what appears to be the death of your dream... TAKE HOPE! Take JOY! Rejoice! Because The Good News says, "This is only Friday. You must let Friday die so that Sunday can live, and never ever forget that Sunday's coming! That's right all you toilers who think 'What's the use?' The use is SUNDAY'S COMING, and it's going to be better than you can even imagine!"

What a day, God. What a day!

~*~
Be sure to visit Staci's new Shoutlife page at: http://www.shoutlife.com/stacistallings As always, you'll feel better for the experience!

As

2007-02-20T06:37:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2003

"Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us."
-- The Our Father

The most perfect prayer. The one Jesus told us, "When you pray, pray like this." Ever since, we've been praying the words He taught us. In fact, we've prayed it so often that many of us don't even think about what we're saying anymore. We run through the words almost unconsciously - memorized to the point that we no longer have to concentrate on what we're saying.

But let me tell you, saying this line without really thinking about what it means is a scary proposition. Why? Because you are asking for exactly the same treatment you've been dishing out. So the question becomes - what have you been dishing out?

Are you judgmental? Do you judge situations and people without really getting to know them? Do you practice quiet prejudice - boxing people in and labeling them because of some outward characteristic? Then when you say "as" you've just asked God to judge you on the same scale. Are you petty? Do you watch for the faults of others and then make sure to point those out to everyone within earshot? Then you've given God permission to pick out and point out each and every one of your faults. Are you jealous? Do you judge actions without bothering to learn the whole story? Are you exacting? Harsh? Impossible to please? Do you brush by people because they have the wrong kind of jeans or the wrong accent or the wrong personality?
Think about what you're setting up for yourself. By saying "as" think about what you've told God to do when you stand before the Throne.

The good news is that "as" works just as thoroughly in a positive direction. Do you have mercy on those around you? Do you forgive? Put the past behind you and truly move on? Do you bless those who have hurt you and pray for those who hate you? Do you actively look for the good even when it seems buried?
If so, that is the scale God will use for you. It's a smart thing to remember the next time you blithely say "as I forgive those..."

*~*~*
Hey, something new and cool... check out Staci's Shoutlife page. http://www.shoutlife.com/stacistallings You'll feel better for the experience!

L.I.G.H.T.

2007-02-16T07:00:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

One of my Holy Spirit friends is teaching Sunday School to 7th grade girls this year. When she first started, my friend was a little lost as to what to teach and what other resources were available, so she innocently asked me if I could help. Little did either of us know where that one simple email would lead.

First, it was just figuring out what song she could use as an opener and then as a closer. I'm a music fanatic, so that wasn't too taxing. Then as the year progressed, we began working through what it means when things don't work out the way you thought they should. We discussed lessons-she is the consummate "activity guru," and I added in insights I've gleaned from my writing ministry. Together, we made a pretty good team.

Just after Christmas she came over to discuss her newest lesson. She had decided to do a lesson on the light of Christ coming into our world at Christmas. She had already gotten candles to use and everything. We worked out the activity-turning off the lights to start in darkness and then explaining with a single flame that Jesus came into our world and brought light. He gave His light to the early Christians, who passed it down through the generations to us, and now we have the opportunity to give His light to others.

The idea was that the first girl's candle would be lit from the Jesus candle, and then each girl would light the next girl's candle until all the candles were lit. We thought it was a pretty good plan-and then she got to class and had two girls instead of 14. She didn't do the light ceremony but did do the other activities she had planned to go with it.

When we talked again, she still wanted to do the light ceremony, but now she needed new activities. She told me that she was thinking about letting the girls take the word LIGHT and see what acronyms they could come up with. I agreed that it sounded like a good plan.

Then the Holy Spirit stepped in. Being a word freak and having some time on my hands as I drove to school to get my children, I started asking, "What would LIGHT stand for to me?"

I came up with some good ones: Love In God's Heart Today. Live In God's Hope Today. Then as I got closer to home, I looked down and noticed a fortune from a cookie we had gotten over the weekend lying on the seat next to me. I picked it up and read it. The word "Luck" jumped out at me because the book I am currently working on is called "Lucky."

Because I had been looking for "L" words, I immediately thought, "Hmm... Luck... How would that work in the word LIGHT?" Then a thought went through my head. "Luck Is God's Help." Instantly I got excited, but then I realized there was not "T" word. So I said, "Okay, Holy Spirit but what does the T stand for?" Instantly the answer came... "Luck Is God's Help... Trusted."

You might think I came up with that. I didn't. It's too perfect. It's too Holy Spirit!

The cool thing is that for years-literally-people have told me that I was lucky. I always said, "Yeah, and I work darn hard to get that luck to work out." Up until the middle of last year, that was completely accurate in my life. I did work darn hard to be so "lucky." And it was work.

However, about the time my friend started teaching, I started putting things in the Holy Spirit's hands, and life has not been the same since. "Luck" has started literally pouring my direction. So much so, that when the title "Lucky" showed up for my new book, I knew it was perfect because the main theme is putting life in God's hands and how it works so much better when you do that.

Well, you can be sure that I couldn't wait to get home and call my friend. Thing is: She called me first with awesome news! (I love the way the Holy Spirit works!) Just before Christmas she had taken her teacher's certification test, and at the time she commented that it seemed that "everyone else is freaking out, but I'm
not worried. I know whatever happens, it's what God meant to happen."

Then today she calls to tell me that she had gotten her scores in... A 91! 73 out of 80 questions right! That,
for those of you who don't know, is a slam-dunk on a really challenging test!

Now some people might say she got lucky. But there's no doubt in my mind that she and I both know that "luck" came because she was living in the "light." Luck Is God's Help Trusted... It's such a cool way to live!

~*~*~
Visit http://www.stacistallings.com/Previews.htm to read the newest chapters of Staci's books! You'll feel better for the experience!

Thoughts on "Losing" the Kairos Prize

2007-02-13T04:34:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2007

I used to think the point of a disappointing outcome was so that I could learn to DO better next time. I'm beginning to think it has nothing to do with learning to DO better. It has to do with learning to BE better-being a better person, a more gracious person, a more loving person, a fuller person who knows what it is to be disappointed so I can appreciate the joy more when it comes. But even as I appreciate it, that I can be truly compassionate with those who have had their dreams put on hold once again as I have now.

I could well spend my time now trying to learn to DO better-to write a better script, to write a better pitch better, to write a better synopsis or a better logline. I think instead I will spend my time learning to BE better. To be a more loving person in everything I do, to show God's love more intensely and more fully to everyone I meet, to understand that He has a plan, and even though I do not see it or understand it, that still I can trust its work in my life and in the lives of those around me.

This then, is not defeat. It is ultimate victory for I have learned a new lesson in a new way and begun a new day as a new person in Christ. He has a plan, and I'm so very grateful for that-not just for the plan but for the deeper knowledge that when the waves overtake me, that He will be there to reach down and pluck me out. And then, with that loving smile of His to look me in the eyes and give me a lesson to help me BE better next time.

It is a lesson I will cherish forever.

~*~*~
Yes, I didn't win the contest, but I want to thank you all so much for your prayers and good thoughts! They mean the world to me. Please pray for those still in the contest--for the finalists and for the winners. May God's light shine through their work into our darkened world!

I Want Them to Say...

2007-02-09T13:20:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

The other night I got to talk extensively with one of my favorite Holy Spirit friends-my sister. Since we both have families to keep up with now, that doesn't happen as often as it used to, so we really took advantage of this time. Late into the night we talked about what God is doing in our lives and about how He has recently been bringing up places in each of us that need to be healed.

As we talked, she said, "You know, ever since I was first married, I had one goal. I wanted to be the best mom to my kids. I wanted them to say when they were grown up, 'We had the best Mom. She was so great.'" On the whole not a bad dream. I think many of us moms think exactly the same thing.

However, she didn't stop there. She said, "Now I see how that dream is about me. It's about what I want to hear because I want to have earned that. Then they other day, I realized that I don't care if they ever say that about me. What I want them to say more than anything is: 'We have the best God ever! He is so great!' Now I think if they say that when they get older, I will have done my job."

Wow. I was blown away. Not just for her, but for me.

You see, the business of writing often starts as a desire just to write. You just love to write, and so you do. Then you get a little better and a little better, and pretty soon, you begin to sense that "just writing" is not enough. Now, you want to be published. So, you begin to learn the rules of publishing, and you work, and you hone, and you learn. And pretty soon, a new goal creeps into your soul. "I want to touch a lot of people with my words about God. I want not just to be published, but to be thought of by many as a great writer."

After our conversation, I see that for what it is... having your focus on the WRONG GOAL. It's like my eighth grade girls' basketball team. It was our second game of the year. The first half went by, we went to the locker room, came back out, and were ready to start the second half. Now if you don't know, when you start the second half, the teams switch ends of the court.

They tipped off, our girl got it and proceed to dribble to the other team's goal where she made the shot! Her technique was great, her shot flawless, but the problem was, she was shooting at the wrong goal!

I wonder how many of us want to be the best... the best fathers, mothers, sisters, brothers, friends, writers, accountants, salespeople, workers... And yet, we are shooting at the wrong goal.

In the last 24-hours my life goal has changed. I no longer want everyone to think I'm the best writer. If somehow, they see through my writing that He is the best God ever, and their lives begin to reflect that, then I have accomplished the new goal for my life.

How about you? Are you shooting at the wrong goal-wanting to be the best salesperson, counselor, or teacher? Maybe God is asking that you start being those things in a way that points people to the best God ever. You do that, whatever else you do, you will be successful.

~*~*~
Say a prayer, light a candle. http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/candles.cfm?l=eng&gi=cwby Staci's virtual vigil for "Cowboy" as it goes through the semi-finals. I ask anyone who feels so led to light a candle and say a prayer that "Cowboy" will touch all those who come in contact with it with God's deep and abiding love for them. The Kairos Prize for Uplifting Screenplays will be awarded Feb. 20. Any and all prayers are greatly appreciated!

Special Announcement

2007-02-07T22:18:00.000-08:00

I just found out that my script, "Cowboy" is one of 31 semi-finalists for the Kairos Prize for uplifting screenplays. Some of you might remember praying for this special intention a few months back. May I just say, "Thank you so very much for all the prayers!" The prizes will be announced on Feb. 20, 2007, and the top winner will most likely be made into a movie.

So I come to you again and ask you to pray... that "Cowboy" will touch those it was meant to touch when God put the idea in me--whoever that ends up being.

If you want to see the official announcement, you can go to: http://www.kairosprize.com/kps06/releases02/KPRelease.02.01.07.pdf

Thanks to all of you for being the places God can pour His love through me onto a world that needs Him so very badly!

Peace,

Staci Stallings

The Gifts

2007-02-07T05:15:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

Since reading Brennan Manning's The Ragamuffin Gospel, the meaning of the gifts of the Holy Spirit has suddenly come alive for me. Prior to reading about how grace can transform your life, I was already pretty solid in "letting Him do it." As a reformed control-freak, I had made a conscious choice to stop trying to control everything. I took my hands off the wheel and said, "God, You take my life where You want it to go."

It didn't take long before I could see how much better He put things together in my life. I could see how He put the people I most needed in my life, how He arranged meetings and "coincidences" to guide me in where I was supposed to go, how He formed a relationship seemingly for one purpose even though He had something much bigger in mind. However, it wasn't until Manning's book that I understood that the Holy Spirit was not "out there." It was "in here." In me.

It was literally God's Spirit in my heart, in my body, in my spirit. Wow! Did that understanding open doors!

I had always been taught about the gifts of the Holy Spirit-wisdom, knowledge, understanding, fortitude, right judgment, fear of the Lord, and piety. However, after letting the Holy Spirit not just direct my paths but begin to live through me, I have come to really understand these gifts in a new light.

A friend of mine is teaching a 7th grade Sunday school class. She came one day depressed because during the past Sunday's class her personal life had interfered with her teaching life. She said, "I just think I failed them." I then asked her if she had put it in the Holy Spirit's hands. "Yes." To which, I asked, "Do you think the Holy Spirit can fail?" A long pause. "No."

"Then if you've put the situation in the Holy Spirit's hands, if He is living through you, can you fail?"

It was the first time I had ever put it in those words even for myself, but at that moment, I got it. The more I put my life in His hands and let Him take control in situations instead of me trying to control them based on my meager knowledge and understanding, the more I see that nothing is impossible. Even if something looks like a failure to me, He has a plan.

When you let go and let the Holy Spirit take control, no longer will you have "I should've said but I didn't" or "I would've, but I was afraid." When He speaks to your heart, you learn to listen and to do and to say. Better than that you begin to let HIM listen and do and say through you, and when that happens, the gifts that follow are more amazing than you can ever imagine!

~*~*

Visit Staci's website: http://www.stacistallings.com You'll feel better for the experience!

What is Success?

2007-02-02T14:06:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings 2003

Everyone wants success. People talk about setting goals and positive thinking and getting to the top. However, most of these same people never really define what success means to them.
Instead they think only in terms of the next big promotion or the next raise or climbing the corporate ladder, but few ever stop to really look at where these goals are taking them.

World-renown motivational speaker Zig Ziglar says that to define success, you should stand on the goal line of life and look into the end zone. What you want to see there sets the parameters for your definition of success.
In other words, ask most people what they want from life, and they will say, “I want to be happy.” That’s great, except for two things: they seldom know with any certainty what happiness actually means to them, and secondly, they never actually plan to be—nor take the time to be—happy.

Instead of taking the time to be happy now, most people fall into the when-I-get-over-there-then-I’ll-be-happy syndrome. If you look, you see these kinds of people every day—maybe even when you look in the mirror. “When I get that promotion, then I’ll be happy.” “When the kids are back in school and I can do this, then I’ll be happy.” “When we get out of debt, then I’ll be happy.”

Problem is, it doesn’t work that way. If happiness is your goal; if having been happy is something you really want to see in the end zone of your life, then you have to start being happy today. Not tomorrow, not in a week, not when “X” happens—TODAY.

So, how do you do this?

First, you must seriously ask yourself, what makes you happy? What makes you feel alive and completely in touch with the essence of yourself?

Maybe it’s hiking or skateboarding or baseball or running. Maybe it’s painting or music or writing or dance. Maybe it’s something as simple as taking a cup of tea out to the porch to watch a sunset.

Immediately you say, “I don’t have time to do that stuff. I’m busy making a living. I don’t have enough time as it is.” And then you wonder why you aren’t happy.

If happiness is a goal you have, then you must schedule time every day to do something that makes you happy. As Annie Dillard, the author of Pilgrim at Tinker Creek, said, “How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.”

The question to you then, is how are you spending your days? The reality is that what you have right now is exactly what will be in that end zone on your last day here. Is this what you want?

If so, congratulations! If not, you can start right here, right now to make a new ending. Decide today what will be in your end zone, and then make the changes to get that in your life today. You deserve it, but don’t put it off. You don’t have a second to waste.

*~*~
Stop by Staci's website: http://www.stacistallings.com You'll feel better for the experience!

Boring Yourself

2007-01-30T08:50:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2003

There are certain things in life that I really wanted to get right-especially those things I knew I would only have one shot at. I don't know why exactly, but I've always lived my life thinking about what I want to be proud of years from now when my grandchildren ask about my life. That may be why I was so unhappy when our senior high school class chose our motto.

To me, our motto was supposed to say something about who we were, about who we wanted to be, about where we were going. It had to be inspirational, up-lifting, and encouraging. In short, it was important to me to get it right. My own motto was the ultra-up-lifting quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson, "What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared with what lies inside us." See? Exceptionally inspirational.

So I was mortified when the motto I had nominated (no, almost 15 years later I don't remember what that was) went down in flaming defeat to the motto the rest of the class wanted. The eye-raisingly dubious motto: "Is life not a thousand times too short for us to bore ourselves?"

Now I knew why the partiers in our class chose this saying. I knew what it meant to them, and I was horrified that for the next million years or so, my photo would hang just over this audacious maxim in the high school halls.

However, life has a way of pulling you up short just when you think you've got it all figured out. Nineteen months after our graduation, one of the kids who had fought the hardest for this very motto was killed in a car accident. By all accounts he was by then an upstanding member of our military-busy pursuing a life he had partied too hardy to see in high school.

When I heard the news, I had to think that yes, life was far too short for that young man to have bored himself. Far too short indeed.

Turns out, though, as hard as I fought against having this saying hang under my photo, it is the perfect saying for the way my life has gone as well. There have been very few boring moments since the 23 of us hung that plaque on that wall. Many, many of those moments I've spent frantically trying to keep up, catch up, or get ahead. Very few have been spent sitting around wondering why someone doesn't come do something for me.

Yes, I'm living, and I'm proud I am. I don't have time to be bored. Life's too short. If I forget that, all I have to do is think of my high school class who forced me to understand something about myself that I hadn't even realized was there. I also think about the young man who fought so hard to give me that gift. I will be forever grateful.

I know I will remember that lesson-even when my grandkids ask. So, I guess that's one thing I got right.

~*~
Please say a few prayers for the script I have in the contest that will announce in the next couple of weeks! Thanks. Staci

Up On the Mountain of Faith

2007-01-26T07:00:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2003

"Help! Help! No help, I'm sliding!"

"You're on skis, Ashley. That's the point."

The poor girl at the top of the line who was headed to the bunny slope lift was scared to death-paralyzed with fear to the point that any tiny move seemed destined to pitch her down the mountain out of control. Her friend seemed not to understand the direness of her situation. To her, skiing was easy. She didn't understand, but I did.

Always longer on doubt and fear than on calm and cool in the sports arena, I understood. Movement on skis seems unfamiliar, unexpected, and dangerous. What seemed like such a fun idea only moments before now seems like the dumbest thing anyone's ever talked you into.

Okay, so even now there are hundreds of people swooshing down the slopes effortlessly. They obviously know what they are doing. You obviously don't, and so fear takes over. No, not just fear but overwhelming panic that grips your gut and wrenches out small terrified shrieks. This is nuts-craziness. Much better to turn back from this unknown now and go back to the safety of what you do know-life on safe, solid, non-snow-packed ground.

And yet, what Ashley couldn't see at that moment, what she couldn't yet feel is how wonderful it feels to fly, to feel yourself swooping down the mountain with only the wind and the white powder for friends. It's exhilarating, awe-inspiring, life changing. But right there, on the fringes looking in, it just feels like something you'll never be able to do. Something that's destined to kill you if you slide one more inch.

I think that's how a lot of people live life. They see the people who have Jesus in their lives. They see the people who have peace, and it looks so wonderful. Yet they are unsure of how or if to make that decision. Unsure if they can really "do this."

The one thing these people don't need is those "skiers" of us acting like they're silly for feeling like they do. They aren't silly. Their fear is real, and if we don't help them through their fear, they're likely to click those skies right back off and go sit down. Instead of acting superior to them or worse being condescending to their fears, we need get back to the place where we were fearful of taking this giant leap of blind faith and allow them to work through their fear with us at their side.

Undoubtedly in no time at all they will be swooshing down the slopes of faith completely forgetting they were ever afraid of taking that first step. At that point because you have shown them how, maybe, just maybe they'll offer some understanding to another fearful skier along the way home. One at a time, maybe we can get everyone in this fearful world up onto that mountain of faith and skiing through it like a pro.

~*~
Check out more articles by Staci at: http://www.stacistallings.com/articles.htm You'll feel better for the experience!

The Fence

2007-01-23T15:49:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

We had just been talking about it. Not ten minutes before we were talking about what place God's rules should play in your life. Are they "in stone" so that God has something to point to when He throws you into the fire? "You should've known! I gave you the Ten Commandments, and you did it anyway!"

We had discussed our children and whether or not you can teach a child with "only love," or do you have to pound the rules into them? How will they know what's right and wrong if you don't set down the rules and make sure the child knows where they are? That was the question. Don't you need the rules to raise a child?

In the discussion I said what I've said in other articles, that God gave us the Ten Commandments because He loves us. He knows that there are times when we are so in the fog of "right now" that we, if left to our own experiences and understanding, might fall into mistakes that will forever alter our lives for the worse. He knows, and so He gave us a way to know "this is not done if you want to live a healthy, prosperous, successful life." So the rules are there not for punishment, but for love.

Shortly after our discussion, I walked outside to go to my vehicle, which was parked a considerable distance down the road. We were on the far outskirts of the town. There was very little ambient light from about a half-mile away. In short, it was dark out there. I was in a hurry, so I didn't wait for my eyes to adjust. I stepped off the porch and walked out to the parked cars.

Not familiar with the lay of the land, I strode passed the cars. Trying to figure out how I could get to my van without walking on the road-although there were no cars there anyway, I kept walking. I tried to see where I was going, figure out where I was even as I kept walking. Finally, my brain said, "Just find the road and then follow it to the van."

It's interesting how in the fog of "right now" my brain works. It keeps talking to me, trying to discern where I am, where I'm going, how I'm going to get there even as I keep going. Very rarely does it say, "Hey! Stop and figure it out before we go forward!" Oh, no. We're going, and we've got to get there.

Then I realized that my feet were brushing weeds. "Oh, it's the weeds. I'm in the ditch. The road should be right here..." Suddenly I found myself standing six inches from A FENCE! Not just any fence. This was a four level, barbed-wire, held together with metal stand-up fence posts. In less than a heartbeat, I stopped my headlong motion. I literally said, "A fence? What's a fence doing on this side of the road?"

Yes, I'm not always the brightest bulb in the lamp. Then I turned around and realized with some chagrin that I had gone passed the cars, through one ditch, onto and over the road, down and back up the other ditch, and I didn't figure out my mistake... until I suddenly saw that fence.

Funny, I think that's exactly the lesson we were just talking about minutes before.

~*~
Insights & Wisdom galore! http://www.stacistallings.com You'll feel better for the experience!

Lifting Your Hands

2007-01-19T07:38:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2006

It's sad how difficult we make being a Christian. We do it to ourselves and to each other-putting rules and conditions on ourselves once we're saved. Before we're saved, we're told, "You can't do it. Jesus is your salvation." After we're saved, we're told, "Okay, here's the rules. You can do this. You can't do that. Don't even think about doing that." And I'm not even talking about the big rules like killing someone or being envious of their position. I'm talking about pickiness that goes way beyond that.

For example, in my line of work-Christian romance writing, there are "rules," some call them "standards." They go like this:

You can't have anyone in your story drink alcohol because some of our readers don't believe in drinking.

You can't have anyone in your story dance. Ditto number one.

No sitting on laps. That's too intimate.

No taking off clothes-even if the character is alone and it's completely innocent.

No showers.

Do not show the character in bed even alone. And the character may never be described as being in their pajamas-even if they are alone because that is suggestive.

Now, I'm sure they have their reasons for all these rules, but for me, rules are not where it's at. We spent two thousand years in the Old Testament going around and around and around that mountain to come to the conclusion that rules don't work! We can't do it. Only God can.

Personally, I think we are far more like a baby who is trying to walk than a god who can come up with enough rules to keep us in line. Further, I think we can learn a lot about how God loves us by watching a good parent with a baby.

A child who is learning to walk first stands, and when he falls, a good parent does not huff in disgust at the child's "failure." A good parent does not condemn the child, call him worthless and give up on him. No. A good parent immediately picks the child up, praises him, loves him, and encourages him to try again.

Now does the parent pretty much know the child will fall again? Sure. If you've ever been there when a child takes his first steps, you know they are going to fall. Does that deter the good parent from praising and applauding each and every small step the child takes? No. Because they know it's their praise that will encourage the child to take another.

Just as it is with our Heavenly Father. He is ecstatic when we take a step-even a faltering one-toward Him. From my own experience with my kids, it wouldn't surprise me if God called all the angels in to watch. "Oh, look! Johnny took another step toward real understanding of Me, toward really learning to be loving!" And, I'm equally sure that the angels for love of the child's Father if nothing else get excited as well.

Does God know we will fall again? Sure. Does that deter Him from getting excited about each positive step we take? No. He, like any good parent, is right there cheering us on, encouraging, praising, smiling at the steps we are taking.

I think the most applause comes when we take not worldly accomplishment steps, but Heavenly accomplishment steps. When we learn to have a little more faith, when we learn to be a little more loving, when we learn to be compassionate and have mercy. I just know God is up there, tears in His eyes for how proud He is of us. I know because I've sat on the floor as my children took their first steps to me, and there is simply no other reaction than tears of joy.

In fact, we would all be much better off if we spent our time as little children, our arms up-reaching to let God pick us up rather than concocting rules to get ourselves "good enough" to spend eternity with Him. The truth is, we are babies in need of a Heavenly Father who loves us so much, He is willing to be patient when we fall because He knows (better than we do) that falling is part of the learning process.

It would be wise for us all to remember that about each other as well. Then we might hear the applause of Heaven because we have taken another small step toward becoming the loving child of God He meant us to be.

*~*
Hey, want a sneak peak at two great Staci Stallings' novels? Just go to: http://www.stacistallings.com/Previews.htm If you love them, tell your friends! You'll feel better for the experience!

Both

2007-01-16T07:23:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

Blessings. We talk about them, pray about them, give thanks for them, and sometimes we even feel very guilty about getting them. Although the Bible says God is "able to do exceedingly abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us," we worry and doubt about how serious He really was when He made that promise.

The cycle goes something like this. We hit rock bottom and remember God might be able to help, so we start praying. We ask, and as He promised, things start looking up. We keep praying because by now it has become a habit. Slowly then more quickly more blessings show up-some that we prayed for, some we never saw coming. Then the guilt slides through us. "Look at all He's given me. How could I even think of asking for more? I mean, isn't that greedy?" So we quit asking until we're in trouble again.

In truth, the paradox is we can never ask God for too much. Why? Because God is limitless, boundless, infinite. There is literally no limit to God's love or to His desire to pour that love into and through our lives onto others. Satan knows this, so he uses our best instincts against us. "Don't be greedy. You have enough. Don't ask for more." "Think about those who don't have as much as you have. Take your fair share, and be satisfied with that." "Aren't you ashamed of yourself for even asking God about something like that? He doesn't have time to listen to such petty concerns." And on and on.

Unfortunately, he's good at it. He has us convinced that there are things too small for God to worry about in our lives. He has us convinced that if things are good, asking for more is asking too much of God. Worst of all, he has us convinced that God has set some sort of invisible limit on what He will give us, and if we cross that line, God will be so angry He will take all the blessings we now have away.

Lies. It's all lies, and yet we buy into it, and we live our lives afraid to ask for the blessings God wants to give us.

Take my friend for example. She was recently lamenting because God in His goodness had provided the perfect apartment for her (after she specifically asked for it). Then He provided the perfect car for her (after she asked for it). Then she stumbled into asking for the thing she most wants-a God-centered man who would come into her life and love her the way she is now loving everyone else. That seemed just too much to ask for, especially after she'd already gotten the other blessings.

She said, "I just feel so greedy wanting it all." As if the Holy Spirit opened a lesson book, she went on, "It's like the other day. I was at the store, and there was this little girl in front of me in line. She walked up with two pieces of candy. The cashier rang it up and said, 'That'll be $1.93.' Unfortunately all this little girl had was $1.

"The cashier said, 'Look. You've got two pieces of candy, but you don't have enough money to buy both, so you're going to have to put one of them back. Which one do you want, and which one will you put back?'"

My friend said, "She was a little girl, and it was candy. Of course she wanted both of them!" The situation became more tense as the cashier began demanding that the little girl make a choice. Then my friend reached into her own purse, pulled out a dollar, slid it to the cashier, and said, "Let her have both of them." She said, "I was just so grateful for all the blessings He's given me, I wanted to share those blessings with someone else."

At the end of her story, I said, "You know what He's trying to tell you through that, right?" She just looked at me as if she hadn't realized there was a message. So, I continued.

Look at it this way: You were the little girl. You wanted both things. Satan was the cashier, looking at you with a sneer saying, "No. You don't have enough to pay for both. You can only have one, so which one will it be? Make a choice already. I've got other people waiting."

And then God who was standing at your side the whole time, without being asked, slipped the full payment to Satan and said, "Let her have both of them. It's on Me."

The truth is, He wants to do that for you. The only stipulation is you must be open to receiving His blessings in your life. By now, He and I have a standing agreement. I'm open. Whatever He wants to send my way is fine by me. In fact, I often simply pray, "All Your best in my life today, God."

Over and over, He has sent blessings I never even saw coming. Friends to support me in times of need, others who He could love through me, moments of such awe-inspiring closeness with Him I have either laughed out loud or cried. I call that exceedingly abundant beyond all that we could ask or think. Wouldn't you?

~*~
Looking for more great insights? http://www.stacistallings.com You'll feel better for the experience!

Life Value

2007-01-12T04:28:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

Everyone understands that if you sell something, you get a cash return. This return may be large or small depending on the quality of the product or service. The cash value of any particular item may be expressed in dollars and cents. A widget may cost $5.00 or a super-widget may cost $5,000.

What most people don't understand, however, is the concept of "life value." In other words the value in enhanced life-terms that the purchaser gains in return for trading their cash for a product or service. Recently when I read about this concept, I went, "Wow! I'd never thought of it like that." What I was particularly impressed with was how different this makes life itself feel as it is expressed through me and as I look at others.

A simple example (and the one I am most familiar with) is brought to expression in my books. My first collection of short stories "Reflections On Life" was recently published. The cash value of this book is $12.95. In order to purchase the book, that is what a reader would have to pay for it. However, the life value can vary widely depending on the purchaser.

Let's say I talked someone who never reads into purchasing "Reflections." This person would turn over $12.95, take the book home, put it on their shelf, and the life value of that book would be zero-unless by some miraculous intervention it fell into the hands of another person who was a reader.

Now, let's take that same book. The cash value is still $12.95; however, this time the purchaser is not only an avid reader but fully engaged in learning about life and putting that knowledge into action. In this instance, the life value may well be immeasurable because that person will take the concepts in the book, apply them to their lives and the lives of those around them, and life increases for everyone involved-whether they directly read the book or not.

As I thought about this concept, I realized how transferable to other circumstances it is. My brother-in-law for instance is a banker. He deals mostly in granting loans to farmers and individuals for homes and cars. If he were to talk someone into taking out a loan that they did not need, the life value of that loan could well be negative because it would drain the borrower's spirit as well as their pocketbook. However, if he lends money to a farmer for instance, and that farmer uses the loan to purchase seed and equipment to grow and harvest the crop that results, the life value of that loan is surely immeasurable. Not only does the farmer make a profit and thereby enhance his life by being able to provide for his own family, but the fruits of his labor enhance the life value of every person who then purchases and consumes or uses the products that results from this crop.

Isn't that an awesome way to think about what you do for a living?

And there are other prime examples in my own family. My mother and my sister both baby sit. The cash value of what they do pales so far in comparison to the life value of that endeavor that it's ridiculous! And another example, my brother sells tools to fix cars. Each tool he sells has the capacity to enhance the life of the mechanic who buys it because he can now do in 2 minutes what would've taken 2 hours to do with the wrong tool. Not only that, but that one tool has enhanced the life of every person whose car it is used to fix. It also enhances the lives of all those other drivers on the road who are now safer because that car is working properly. It also conceivably enhances the lives of those who drive and ride in that car-to work, to school, to Grandma's for Christmas. Think of the life value of that one, simple sale!

My brother's wife has recently begun cleaning houses. Think of the time these families now have to be together enjoying life rather than picking up and vacuuming because of her contribution to their lives. She also gives her time (not paid) to help at her children's schools and their various teams and clubs. There is literally no telling how much life value she is adding to the existence not only of her children but of all of the children who benefit from her efforts. Life value abounds from her efforts!

My husband builds things. He builds houses. He fixes doors. He builds cabinets. Each and every fix-it job and new construction that he lends his hands to increases the life value of someone and sometimes that of many someones. Innumerable people have walked through doors that work because of him. They have stored important information in cabinets he built. They have lived and raised their children in houses that he built. Life. Life. Life in the extreme-not because of cash value but because of life value.

And it gets better, my father is the janitor and the baseball coach for my hometown high school. He spends his days making sure the teachers have what they need to be able to impart knowledge to a whole passel of children. The cash value of this may not be huge, but the life value is astronomical to the point that you cannot even count it!

So the question is: When you think about the value of what you are doing, do you assess your success only in terms of cash value-thereby trying to sell whether the product will enhance or diminish the purchaser's life, or do you make a serious effort to greatly multiply the purchaser's life experience through your product or service? It's a great question, and life looks very different depending on which "value" you are focused on.

The examples are everywhere! Walk down an aisle at the grocery store. Look at a box of cereal or a bottle of medicine. You pay cash value of $3 to $10 for this purchase, but it makes you full or makes you well. Life value.

Once you understand this concept, take a moment to visualize those who have traded hours of their lives to enhance YOUR life value. There's the life value of the person who came up with the grocery cart you are pushing. Think of the time-savings and therefore the life value that represents. There is the person who built the shelves so that the products can be displayed in an orderly fashion.

There is the person who put those shelves together. There is the person who stocked those shelves so you can just walk in and buy what you need without hours of searching. There is the person who created the item that you are buying-the person who came up with the type of cereal, the person who figured out that "this combination of molecules" will cause your body to do this and thus get well.

The reality is that life value is everywhere you look. When you take life value for granted or discount it because you are focused on cash value, you're missing the point completely. Try it. I challenge you. Begin to look at life value for one day, and if it doesn't completely change how you look at life, you can always go back to measuring everything in dollars and cents.

~*~
Read more at: http://www.stacistallings.com You'll feel better for the experience!

Drowning Lessons

2007-01-09T04:26:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2006

Any lifeguard will tell you the worst thing someone that the lifeguard is trying to save can do is to "help." A drowning person in a panicked attempt to "save" themselves by thrashing about can end up taking the lifeguard down with them. It's a lesson all of us need to learn no matter how good we are at swimming in spiritual waters.

Many people ask: "What is my purpose here on earth?" They go through various exercises and workshops to find out what their purpose is. I will save you some time and money if you, too, are asking this age-old question.

You have one purpose here on earth, and it can be summed up in two words: to learn.

You were sent here to learn-to learn about yourself-your capabilities, your liabilities, your strengths, your weaknesses, your abilities, and your limitations. You were also sent here to learn about and how to deal with others-those who are easy to love and those for whom God's mercy will have to be super-abundant for their forgiveness to be obtained.

Nonetheless, you were mostly sent here to learn about God and His unending, unfathomable, unstoppable, overwhelming, unbelievable love for you.

One of the biggest lessons and one of the hardest to take and accept is what has been called a disruptive moment. These are the times in your life when you have been easily walking next to the water when suddenly something pushes you in to the deep end.

This something might be someone. It might be an event or an illness or death or a sudden change that blows gaping holes in your belief that all is right with your world.

Suddenly you are buffeted-slapped on every side with wave after wave of despair, doubt, anger, hopelessness, helplessness, grief, anxiety, and fear so strong it pulls you under like a rip tide.

I believe what we are sent here to learn is that it is precisely in these times of trial and fear that we learn the real depth of God. It is in these moments that the Almighty Lifeguard takes hold of us, rather than us holding onto Him.

The problem here is that many of us continue to struggle. We continue to try to save ourselves even as the waves wash over us time and again. What God says to us at these moments is exactly what the lifeguard would say to the drowning person. "Relax. Let Me do it. Do not rely on your strength, trust in Mine."

Your purpose here is primarily to learn that one lesson as deeply as possible. When the storms blow, quit struggling. Trust the Lifeguard.

He has the strength you need. Relax, and let Him work in your life, and you will surely see wonders come from the moments you thought you were destined to drown. By your own effort, you would have. In His strength, however, you will be brought out of the waters of chaos and confusion into a new life you can only know when you have felt both the rip tide and His marvelous, sustaining strength.

In your weakness, His strength can be made manifest. Trust it for it will save you-especially when you feel you are drowning.

~*~*~
Want more? Check out www.stacistallings.com You'll feel better for the experience!

Stage or Altar?

2007-01-05T04:32:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

Plastic Christians. You know the kind. They know all the words, spout all the rules, sing all the songs, join everything, and they look really good doing it, too. Their suits are pressed. Their ties are straight. Their dresses are the mint of modesty. And yet, it all seems too good, too perfect. All plastic, no feeling.

Recently I came face-to-face with the plastic Christian in me. Oh, she talked a good game. To the world, she looked good in her deeds. She was no doubt Christian, but plastic nonetheless.

You see, deeds done out of fear of being found less than the perfect Christian are dead deeds--no matter how good they look. A song I heard by Casting Crowns puts it this way:

Am I the only one that's traded an altar for a stage?

Now before you jump on the bandwagon of spirit-bashing the choir or the readers or those in other visible ministries, I suggest as Jesus said, that you look first at yourself. If you are without sin here, then you may cast a stone.

These words are not talking about the more visible ministries in the church. They are not meant to say, never sing in the choir, never volunteer for a visible ministry. They invite you to look at WHY you are joining. More than that, they are talking about you and your walk every day with Christ. Is it a performance or a sacrifice? Are you on the stage or on the altar?

If you're not sure, from experience, ministry of performance looks like this: you say all the right words, but your heart feels very few of them. You read the Bible religiously, go to church without fail, you can recite all the rules and the prayers as well--but it all feels empty as if you are going through all the motions because that's what's expected. You join the organizations, help with the youth, volunteer for every fundraiser, attend classes, teach classes. You serve and serve and serve until you've got no more to give, and then you find a way to give some more. You feel burned out and used up, and yet there are still people hurting, still more you should give. You want to live out the Christian life, but the reality for you is, it's tiring work.

That's performance. Performance is going on your own ability, choosing the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil over resting in the Tree of Life.

Things look and feel very different when you're on the altar. When you're on the altar, the comprehension of your smallness when compared with His enormity is reassuring--not judgmental, frightening, and depressing. You suddenly realize you can't, but He can. That understanding frees you to jump into situations where failure in the world's eyes is a real possibility, but even if you fail when He whispered the task on your heart, you know that somehow from His perspective, even that failure is a victory. Better, you trust that it's a victory and move forward in confidence--not because you think you can do it, but because you know you don't have to--He will.

On the altar when you read the Bible, you read it because it's fascinating, because you hear Him speaking to you through it--not because you have to or because you're supposed to. Prayers might be memorized or they might well be, "Hey, God. It's me, so glad You're here." Either way, they feel like a personal friendship rather than an empty exercise in pleasing a God you suspect will never be pleased no matter how much you do.

On the altar, you let go of the driving need to prove anything to anybody. You just are. You open your life to Him, just as a sacrificed animal on the altar is cut open, so are you. In a very real way, you die to who you were, to your own ability, to your own performance. Impressing others pales in comparison with being real and being honest about your fears, about your failures, and about who you really are. You suddenly have no desire to wear the mask of plastic Christianity, and the more it is stripped away by His loving, accepting presence, the more you begin to allow others in your presence to remove theirs.

As I thought about the concept of stage or altar, performance or sacrifice, the story of Cain and Abel slid into my consciousness. Has there ever been a more perfect example of what performance-based Christianity leads to?

There's Cain tilling his little performance heart out, thinking how pleased God is going to be with this offering and being pretty pleased with his offering before it even gets to God. How could God not be impressed? After all, Cain reserved the best of his harvest for the Lord. But when he presents the offering to God, God shrugs. Instantly Cain gets angry. How dare the Lord not fawn over his offering!

Then, in walks Abel who presents his offering to the Lord. Abel, innocent, trusting, a sacrifice personified. And the Lord is pleased with Abel's gift. This infuriates Cain who rises up, and in his jealousy and anger, kills his brother.

Are you Cain in your Christian walk? Do you look around and become envious of someone else's service, of someone else's gifts? Do you judge those who aren't as Christian as they should be? Are you completely sure that God will accept your gifts over someone else's because yours are so obviously better? Do you work for God, or does God work through you?

Take it from someone who was on that stage for far too long: It's a lonely, miserable, rotten place to be. More over, as scary as being on the altar sounds, the freedom it affords is worth every spotlight you have to give up.

So, are you on the stage or the altar?

~*~*~

Want more inspiration? Check out Staci's books at: http://www.lulu.com/spirit-light You'll feel better for the experience!

Who Has He Helped Through You Today?

2007-01-02T14:01:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

As I write this, it is December 5th. I mention that because with Christmas coming up, it is the season of giving. Along with the normal gifts, this is also the season when our thoughts turn to those less fortunate.

The paper angel trees go up in the malls. The kettles and bells come out. The requests from organizations that help the needy - from food banks to Toys-for-Tots - rise exponentially.

This is also the time our thoughts take in all the things we are grateful for and all the things that we wish for in the coming year. In short, this is a very special time of the year.

As January approaches, my thoughts have been on the New Years Resolution I made last year. The resolution itself was simple - to be an angel to as many people as possible. At the time I couldn't have foreseen many of the opportunities that came my way. In fact, maybe I thought of it more as a wish than a real resolution.

However, God used that desire to show me things about life I had never seen before, like how little it takes to make a difference, how a simple heartfelt note can change someone forever, how easy it is to love when you put fear out of the equation.

As the year progressed, I learned what it means to let Him help through me. I learned that I don't have to do it. All I have to do is let Him guide my heart and my hands. All I have to do is let Him do it through me.

God has helped countless people through me this year - the homeless lady who desperately needed work and who now cleans my house (praise God for her!), the homeless people three states away who are wearing something I no longer needed, the young mother struggling through a heartbreaking betrayal who received a book and a CD filled with Christ's love for her and her family and knew someone cared.

The opportunities were boundless-as they always are. The biggest problem is we find so many ways to talk ourselves out of helping. We're too busy. It takes too long. It costs too much. We have our own problems.

The real problem is that the focus of all of those excuses is in the wrong direction - on "I" instead of on "Him".

St. Theresa once said that we are the only hands that Jesus has on this earth, the only feet Jesus has on this earth now. He wants to use our lives, to work through us in the world.

As the words of a song that's just come into my life says: "Days go by. . . it's all we've been given, so we better start living right now, 'cause days go by."

I don't think I'm going to set any goals this coming year as I have in the past. I think this year my resolution will be simply to let Him work through me every single day. And my question at the end of each day will be simply, "Who has He helped through me today?"

If you are thinking of trying my "angel resolution" out in your life - even if it is April or August or October when you read this - I know for a fact that you are one more person I can say "This is someone He helped through me today."

Peace and joy in your new life as it starts today, because if you take this challenge, today really is the first day of a brand new life.

--Staci

The Crystal Ball

2006-12-29T04:23:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2003

Wouldn't it be nice to be able to see into the future? Especially at those times in life when the road forks, and you have no idea which fork is the best choice. You could choose X, and it could work out marvelously-or it could be a total flop. Or you could not choose X and wish for the rest of your life you had.

Recently I've found just such a crystal ball. No, it doesn't literally allow us to see into the future, but it does allow for the best decision to be made at every fork in the road every single time. What is this crystal ball? Where can you get one?

Well, think for a moment. If I had this crystal ball, what would you be willing to pay for it? Would it be worth ten dollars? A hundred? A thousand? Remember, it will unerringly tell you exactly what is the best thing to do every single time. Surely that would be worth a few dollars in a trade.

Now, what would you say if I told you that this crystal ball is monetarily free. That's right. It costs nothing at all... However, it does require something, and that something is giving up the control you think you have over a situation. It means giving up the notion that you know what the best outcome in a situation is. Here is reality: You don't. You can't. You don't have all of the information to know what is the best outcome in a situation.

But if you don't, then who does? One name: God.

Of course, God who is everywhere in all times and all moments knows. Why? Because unlike you, he can see the whole picture. He can see every ramification of every possible decision in any given situation that you can make. In short, He can see with perfect clarity the choice you should make.

While listening to Bruce Wilkenson's excellent audio, "A Life God Rewards," I heard one line that he really doesn't go on to discuss and expand on. It's more of a transition line pulling together two other thoughts. However, in that line, I realized a lesson that I had used but hadn't put words to. He said:

"As the only person to come from eternity to earth and then return to eternity, Jesus knows the whole truth-past, present, and future-and can give you a one of a kind perspective," Wilkenson says. "For example, he can see your present from a moment far out in your infinite future and tell you exactly how to prepare for what is to come."

Wow! What an unbelievably crystal ball that is! Think about it. If Jesus loves you beyond measure and He wants only what is best for you in the long run (and that means the really long run of eternity), doesn't it make sense to allow Him to guide your life?

Unfortunately that's not how most of us pray. We say things like, "God, if you'll only let me get this job, then I'll be happy." "God, I just need a way to get to work. I'll be perfectly happy with that 20-year-old Honda. Please, if I can just have that..." And God says, "Well, okay, I really wanted to give you this brand new Lexus, but I want to make you happy, so here's your Honda."

What I'm suggesting here is a radical change in thinking. Instead of being outcome-specific in our prayers, wouldn't it be better to take our hands off the wheel and let Jesus decide what's best for us?

True story, my first book had been in the hands of one company for more than a year. They had been promising during the course of that year that it would be out "next month." However, the "next months" had strung together to make a year, and I was getting frustrated. Throughout the course of the year, I had gotten these little pushes that I was to put out a second book with a different company, but I resisted. I didn't want two books out at the same time. I didn't want anyone in the first company mad because I went with a second company. In short, I was paralyzed by a decision that could radically change my future, and I wasn't at all sure which choice to make.

So, I made a deal with God. I basically told Him that I didn't know what He wanted me to do, and I didn't want to make a mistake. So if He didn't want me to put out the second book, He needed to get someone from company one to contact me in the next two weeks. Then I put that decision aside and went to work on other things. When the deadline came, I still hadn't heard anything, so I said, "Okay, 24 more hours, and then I send it in."

Still nothing. So I sent the second book. Two days later company one emailed to give me a publicist. When she later questioned the second book, I said, "God made the decision not me." You know, I have never regretted that decision-even though it was highly unconventional.

I'm not saying you should go around giving God ultimatums. I now realize a simpler method is just to put every day in His hands. Give Him the reins of deciding what's most important for your time. Then when things work out, you know it was His will. When things don't work out like you expected, it was His will, and He has a better idea.

Then all you have to do is do your best, work as hard as you can, and let Him make the decisions. Pray only for guidance and for peace no matter what happens, and I think you will be amazed at the number of incredible answers that will start popping up in your life.

~*~*~
My wish is that YOU will have a Happy Joyous New Year... filled with growth, peace, happiness, joy, and love!

Patience

2006-12-22T09:41:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

Ever since my girls were very little, I've tried to teach them patience. I well remember getting them to count to ten when we had to wait for something. I would tell them, "Count real slow." If they counted "too fast" because I knew they would be finished before whatever we were waiting for was, I would say, "No, that's too fast. You have to start over."

It was a game, and it worked. It gave them something to think about other than what they so desperately wanted. By the time they got to ten, it was ready.

This Christmas I found out that those early lessons with my girls are paying off. My girls, now 9 and 5, were at Grandma's house Christmas morning. They awoke, as most children do on Christmas morning, very early.

When Grandma got up at 8:30 after a late night of playing games and visiting, she found the two of them in the living room looking at the wrapped presents and whispering. Not a box had been touched.

Grandpa got up at nine, and they ate some breakfast. Daddy got up about ten. By that time, the girls had sorted the boxes into Stefani's stack, Kayla's stack, Andrew's stack, etc. and still they were sitting patiently - examining, shaking, holding, discussing, but never opening.

Daddy, being the teasing guy that he is, tried to talk them into opening "just one." But they flatly refused until Mommy and Andrew could be there.

At 10:45, their baby brother woke up, and after a short discussion they decided they'd better wake Mom up because there was no telling how long she might sleep if they didn't.

The first I knew of any of this was when the four of them appeared at my bedside saying, "Mom, wake up. We just can't wait anymore."

I don't know how long my mother will be alive, but I can guarantee she will forever marvel about those few hours on a bright Christmas morn when her two young granddaughters showed her the meaning of real patience.

~*~*~
Merry Christmas and a Happy, Joyous, Peaceful New Year to all! Staci

Life and Death

2006-12-19T08:01:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

Life is God. Death is "not God." When you truly have life, what you have done is to allow God to permeate you so fully that "you" have begun to disappear, and He has begun to live through you. Death is the opposite of this. Death reigns when you are relying on your own power, your own resources, your own strength, and your own knowledge and understanding in any given situation.

In the Garden of Eden, there were two trees-the Tree of Life, and the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. The Tree of Life was quite simply allowing God to live life in and through His creations. The Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil was the belief that we don't need God, that we could live and do it on our own. The moment Adam and Eve ate of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, death came into the world because they chose to rely on themselves rather than on God.

Instantly, they were banished from the garden, the sanctuary that God had made for them, and they were sent out into the world to learn to fend for themselves literally because that's what they had chosen. However, this truth did not begin and end with this one act. It is going on every day in every life capable of making choices on this planet.

That means you.

Yes, you have the choice between letting God live through you or trying to do it on your own. Which are you choosing? I have come to wonder why God sent Jesus into the world with this concept in mind. I believe the answer to that is very simple. He sent Christ who is a part of Himself into the world to restore our choice to rely on God rather than on ourselves. Once again, through Jesus Christ, we have the choice to choose the Tree of Life rather than having as our only option the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil manifested in the laws laid out as a measure of whether we are good enough to be allowed back into God's grace.

On our own, of course we are not good enough. We can't be, for on our own, we are death-literally. On our own, we have no life within us because if we are doing it on our own, that necessarily means that God is not in us. If God is not in us, Life is not in us and we are dead. For God is Life; death is the absence of Life or stated another way, death is the absence of God.

Living on our own we are told that we must rely on competition for limited resources. We must beat others out for the best education and the means to provide for ourselves because if we don't beat them, they will take some and there will be less for us. When we are living on our own, we do not believe that God is All and Everything and that He will provide. No. Instead we believe that if we don't do it, it won't get done. We believe in the empty promises of worldly success and achievement. We seek to impress one another with our wealth, our knowledge, and our worldly attributes-however altruistic they may seem on the outside.

None of this is real. It is death personified, and yet over and over again, we choose this avenue of "being." Even in the Christian life, our service often comes not from God living through us, but from us trying to prove ourselves worthy of Him. It is a fallacy, a lie of the highest proportions. God does not seek our effort. He seeks only to express Himself and His love through us.

It is like Mark Hall from Casting Crowns said when he recounted the story of God making his life's purpose perfectly clear: "Mark, I'm going to do something wonderful in the world. I just want to know if you want to come along."

God seeks to live through us, and when we allow Him to do that, that is Life. That is the Life that Christ came to remind us was available and to restore an option once again.

Through His cross, Christ took onto Himself the shame of the children of God who had tried so valiantly to live up to what God wanted them to be and had failed so miserably, and He allowed that fallacy to be nailed to a cross and forever banished. When He arose, Life arose with Him. When He sent His Spirit, He sent it to once again live in us and through us, making the Tree of Life a possible choice once again.

And still, we choose death over Him. Why?

Good question.

Now you know the truth, is death still your choice?

~*~*~
More inspiration can be found at: http://www.stacistallings.com You'll feel better for the experience!

Called

2006-12-15T04:26:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

Twice in the last week I got called. The first was by a lady whose children are the same age as mine. This lady is someone I've admired for many years. The purpose of her call was to see if I would run for the school board of my daughters' school.

She told me the qualifications, described the job, and told me why they thought I would be good for the position. It was a very thorough offer. I listened to her, and then I listened to my heart. Make no mistake, it was flattering to be wanted. It felt good that someone would think of me for such a position. However, as I took serious stock of where I am right now and what the Holy Spirit has laid on my heart, I knew the only answer I could give her was, "No."

Two days later I got a second call. This one came from a long-time friend of mine. Although she and I had previously discussed the reason for her call, and although I had already declined at least twice, she was calling again. The offer? To join one of the women's organizations at our church.

When I said, "No, but thanks," she couldn't understand why. After all, it's only one night a month, the circle is women my own age, it's a reason to get out of the house, you can serve your community, they are really nice, and it's fun. (If I missed any of the reasons she gave me, I apologize.) Even after all of her reasons, I still said, "No." And to be honest, I still don't think she understands.

Now, please hear me loud and clear-there is nothing wrong with either of these organizations. In fact, they do a lot of great work for the community and for the church. The school board is certainly a worthwhile way to give of yourself, and women's organizations do a lot of good work in our world.

However, when I looked in my heart at this time in my life-with young children, a husband who often works out of town, and the writing ministry that God has shown me time and again He wants me to do-I simply do not feel called to the other organizations. Could I do them? Yes. Could I do them well? Yes. But in my heart I know they would be taking time away from what He really has called me to do.

There may well come a time when I do feel called to these again. After all, it wouldn't be the first time I helped out. In high school, I was an usher at church, I played guitar and sang in three choirs, I was the vice president of the youth organization, and I read in church. In short, I was involved.

On the other hand, right now, I have three children whom I shall never get this time to spend with them back. To be sure, I already miss too much time with them the way it is. It's a balance I don't always hold so well. But when I looked at these offers, and put them on the scales with their importance versus what I feel as God's call for this time in my life-namely raising my children and my writing, the children and writing won out.

Right now, I am called to be here for them, to be able to drop everything if need be if they need me. If I am tied to meetings and service projects, that would not be possible.

Is everyone called to that? No, probably not. It takes getting still long enough to listen to the whisper of the Holy Spirit in your heart to decide. When you take the time to do that, the real call will be clear-whether the phone actually rings or not.

~*~*~
Have a blessed Advent Season!

What Everyone Else Says

2006-12-12T04:54:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2004

Talk about confused, my friend was. She kept saying, "I just cry and say, 'Lord, please tell me what's the truth.'" Understanding her plight wasn't difficult. She was learning something new and needing for it to be right the first time. So she did what any sane person would do, she asked for help. Only the "help" sounded like this:

"You have to have a lot of details."

"You use too many details."

"I like this section."

(Same section) "This section needs a lot of work."

"I like this character."

(Same character) "I hate this character."

"You need a hook."

"Hooks are for the book, not the cover letter."

"You have to do this." "Don't ever do this."

In short, she was drowning in the sea of conflicting advice.

As we talked, she began to see the conflicting advice for what it was - other people's opinions. As my mom always said, "Give me your opinion. I want to hear it, but I don't have to take it."

My friend was heeding the opinions and trying to use all of them, and it was paralyzing her. It's a trap many of us fall into. Everyone has an opinion about how we should be living our lives. We should do this. We have to do this. We can't do that. And many times we get completely conflicting advice. We, too, can be drowning and wondering if there even is a "truth."

After about 15 minutes of hearing about how she didn't understand because all of these advice-givers were multi-published authors, and they should know the truth, in frustration I finally said, "Yes, but they are not God." That stopped her cold.

The truth is that there is no problem with asking for advice, but then you must make the decision for yourself. Some will agree with you. Some will not. But trying to please everybody will soon convince you that nothing you do is right. It will paralyze you, and that's exactly what Satan would love to do.

I suggested that she get quiet, breathe, and listen to what her heart was telling her to do. In all likelihood it won't look much like what the world says is "the only thing that will work" because God doesn't work the way the world does. In fact, His direction may sound absolutely crazy (Christ on the cross comes to mind). However, if you don't have Him guiding you, finding "the truth" is all-but impossible.

Five minutes after I got off the phone from our conversation, I got in my van to get my kids from school. Sean Hannity happened to be on the radio talking to a soldier who had been ridiculed by an anti-war protester.

Hannity said, (I paraphrase), "You can't live your life based on what everyone else thinks - especially if you are to take a real stand. If you make everyone else happy, you will be paralyzed because whatever you do will always be wrong. You have to figure out where you are and be there." After at least a three-minute speech, he took a breath and said, "Whew, I don't know where that came from. Why did I go into that?"

I laughed. It was a message to me verifying what I had just said sent from the Holy Spirit through Sean Hannity over the airwaves even though Sean had no idea that's why he said it. It's pretty cool how the Holy Spirit can get that stuff to work out.

As I told my friend, other people's advice is okay, but you should really be listening to God rather than listening to what everyone else says. If you do that, you will make good decisions for you, avoid mistakes, and quite possibly end up in a place far more wonderful than you had ever imagined existed. That's the way God works.

*~*~*
Looking for great Christmas presents? Check out Staci's books at: http://www.lulu.com/spirit-light You and the receiver will feel better for the experience!

You Already Have

2006-12-08T04:24:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

About a year ago my goals changed radically. The first goal that changed was the one that said my ultimate goal was to get to Heaven and have God say, "Well done good and faithful servant." What I realized was, that goal was about me-what I would get, about what I thought I had earned, and about having Him be proud of me. When the understanding that it wasn't about me but about Him came through my life, I altered that goal to be this: What I want when I get to Heaven is for God to put His arms around me and say, "I love you." That's it. That's all I want. And you know what? He says that every day, so I know that goal is already met.

The second goal I had was about reaching people for God. I wanted to touch as many people as I could for Him. It sounded good, but again, that was about me-not about Him. It was about what I could do for Him. What a joke. The God who put the stars in the sky, formed everything from nothing, and designed it all to perfection, and I was going to do something for Him. Right. What I now understand is that He doesn't need me to do anything for Him, what He wants most is to live through me-just as He lived through Jesus.

Based on that understanding, in the last month or so I have altered that goal as well. My "while I'm here" goal is now: I want anyone who looks at me to see Him-in my writing, in person, on the phone, however we happen to meet. The credit for everything that my life produces is His, not mine. For if He is living through me, it is Him that is doing whatever efforts happen to come through me, so He deserves the credit.

The cool thing about this is that this morning I was listening to a song I'd heard many times and really liked. The song is by Keith Urban. It is one he never released. It's on his "Golden Road" album. It's about his dad and how as he gets older, he sees more things in his life he realizes are things his dad did. Then toward the end of the song, there was a part that just blew me away. It says:

"Everything he ever did, he did with love,
And I'm proud today to say I'm his son.
When somebody says, 'I hope I get to meet your dad,'
I just smile and say, 'You already have.'"

That's my goal to be able to say that by meeting me they've already met my Father for He is living through me. That goal feels like a perfect fit in the way the others never did. The others put me in chains about what I had to do. These goals free me to simply live and watch what He does through me. It's an awesome way to live!

*~*~*
Looking for a great Christmas gift? Check out Staci's books at: http://www.lulu.com/spirit-light They will make the one you love feel better for the experience!

Let Go

2006-12-05T05:02:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2003

Although there are a lot of careers in this life that could teach someone to let go, I think that writing has to be near the top of that list. Maybe that's because I write, or maybe that's because it really is. Whatever the case, this understanding was made clear recently when a writer friend of mine asked the question, "How could I not see the holes in my manuscript that my critique partners caught and pointed out? They were so glaring."

As a writer, I completely understand the frustration in this statement. If you are a high school writer only, you may not. While teaching I saw plenty of high school writers. They wait until the last conceivable moment to start, write down everything they can think of on the topic at hand in no particular order, then race to the teacher's desk to fling the paper at her, hoping it's good enough for passing. These people are not the writers of which I speak.

I'm speaking about the writers who think all the way through every word they put down, who cross out, delete, rewrite, re-think, edit, re-edit, and hone every inch of a manuscript before they let anyone else so much as hear the idea presented in it. These are the writers who research until their eyes bleed, think until their brain hurts, and generally torture themselves over every single word because it doesn't just need to be "good," it needs to be "perfect."

Then after they can see no other place in the entire work of oh, say 80,000 words, they heave a sigh of relief and acquiescence and place it into the hands of someone else to read. In high school, these are the kids who have been finished with the first draft of their 250-word essay 40 minutes before the bell rings, but who are still crossing things out and rewriting them even as they slide toward the teacher who's saying, "That's it. Turn in your papers."

It's painful for them to turn their work over to someone else. It's like a mother leaving her first baby with a sitter for the very first time. They hope and pray the reader will be gentle. They hope that when the paper is returned, there are very few red marks if any at all. And above all, they hope they haven't made any grievous errors that will make the reader think they are a complete imbecile who should never have been given a pen and paper in the first place.

This is the kind of writer my friend was and then came the shocker. She had missed something, and not just something but a huge gaping hole in the story and how she told it. When that happens to a writer of this ilk, devastation sets in like a hurricane across a soul. Even the mildest criticism is like a knife to the gut. Immediately after the devastation blows through the rains of doubt begin to pour. "Maybe I'm not supposed to be a writer. Maybe I just don't have what it takes to do this."

To some extent there might not be a way around this feeling totally; however, I don't think it is completely inevitable. You see, I have found a way (not foolproof but pretty close) to weather this storm and let the manuscript grow as God intended it to. It's called, "Let Go."

That's the short version of having a "Leave Everything To God Opportunity." These types of opportunities are all around us. They are in the panic of a mother when her child is sick. They are in the stress of a business owner who just placed a major bid and then realizes or suspects he missed something. They are in the quiet reaches of our own souls every time we feel that maybe we haven't quite done enough in a given situation.

Here is what I told my author friend, and here is my advice to you. When you have a "Leave Everything To God Opportunity," realize that if you could do it alone, God wouldn't have made everyone else. Each of us has our own, unique experience that we bring to a situation. In short, each of us has a piece of the puzzle to fill in. As writers, we must realize that just because we couldn't see the piece that someone else lays before us that doesn't mean we don't have skill, talent or desire, it just means that they have a different perspective, a different piece to fit into the mosaic of the work.

Instead of abhorring the pieces that someone else fills in, bless them. They just made your puzzle make more sense than it ever could have without that piece. Then thank God for bringing that piece into your life. When you begin to do that, you can then begin to slowly let go earlier and earlier in the process, and the puzzle can come together while you are building it rather than you having to knock it all apart and rebuild it later.

It's not easy for any of us to do, but when you think in terms of "Leave Everything To God Opportunities," the storms of life begin to look less frightening and more manageable than ever before. So try it today. Let Go, and see if He doesn't hand you a piece that on your own you couldn't have known or found but one that makes the whole puzzle fit in a way that it never could have without it. Then celebrate because you have now found the key to how God intended all of us to live, and that key will unlock doors you never imagined could open to you.

Let Go. Let God, and enjoy every "Leave Everything To God Opportunity" that comes your
way.

*~*~*
Looking for Christmas presents for that hard to buy for person on your list? Visit: http://www.lulu.com/spirit-light Inspiration for all! Have a blessed Advent season!

34 Lives

2006-12-01T08:10:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings

Don't freak out. It's not what you think, but I have to this point on earth lived 34 lives. Let me explain. In general, there are two ways to write a novel. The first way is to plot everything, to research, outline and plan every plot twist and event from page one to the final page before you ever write the first word. The other way is sometimes called Seat of the Pants-meaning you don't know much about the story, you just start writing and let the book come to life as you write.

I use a lot of both ways, but I tend to think of it as doing what the Holy Spirit wants when He wants it done. Most of the time I start knowing at least a scene or two of what happens. Sometimes all I know is who the characters are, sometimes I know bits and pieces of the story. No matter how they start, each and every story has stretched me and forced me to grow. I see these as Holy Spirit lessons in many ways.

The first way is I've learned I have to let go of "how I did it last time." However I did it last time is never how I will do it this time-that much I have learned. This time will always be different. This time will always have it's own lessons to teach me.

The second way these stories have taught me is to give me the chance to live many lives-not just this experience I myself call life. In some ways my characters are pieces of me. In some ways I'm pieces of them. When I write, for that time I "become" them. I often take on various characteristics of them as I'm writing their story. I've dressed new-age for a time because that's how one character often dressed. I've worn leather wristbands because that's what a character wore. When I'm in character mode, I listen to the world in a different way. I listen the way they would.

I listen for the lessons they need to learn in the way they need to learn it, and in the process, I learn. It's a cool way to learn because as heart wrenching as a circumstance in a book is, I have the option of turning off the computer and processing for awhile. In real life, you can't do that.

Through my characters I have experienced poverty and riches far beyond what I will ever have. I have worried about where my next meal will come from and about how to save a youth center from being closed. I have jumped off the edge of sanity into alcohol and relived a drug addiction. I have seen the loneliness of getting the dream you thought you wanted but missing the things that are truly important along the way. And with every experience, I have learned in a way I couldn't have from my own experience.

To date I have completed 17 novels. Since I write from the point of view of the hero and that of the heroine in each book, I have now lived 34 lives. This unique life experience-both my life and getting to marinate in others' souls for a time-has taught me many things about this life that I couldn't have learned had I only lived my own life experience.

I firmly believe that being able to walk in each of my characters' shoes for a time has given me knowledge that I would not have otherwise been privy to gaining in any other way. It has opened my eyes to how a single situation can be interpreted in radically different ways depending on the particular perspective of any individual involved. Because of this, I now understand that no matter how firmly you believe your experience is definitive, the other person is probably as adamant that their interpretation is the only valid one as well.

This knowledge has saved me on more than one occasion from assuming that because my interpretation of events was X that everyone else's was too. I am more willing to listen to other perspectives. I am more willing to dig for what's really going on rather than assuming I know and going on faulty personal interpretation.

It's a lesson I greatly value, and one I will forever be glad that God allowed me to have. How else could you live 34 lives and not be counted insane? Unless of course you were to read other's experiences... hmm.... There's an idea.

*~*~*~*
Check out Staci's characters at: http://www.stacistallings.com/bookshelf.htm You'll feel better for the experience!

The Light

2006-11-28T04:29:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2004

Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path. Psalm 119:104

My dad always says that God doesn't put the light on your head so you can see way out into the future, He puts it at your feet so you can see the next step. While doing a walk recounting Jesus' journey to Calvary, I was with a large group of women. The walk began at dusk and continued as the light around us faded and slowly vanished.

The leaders had given each of us a battery-operated candle. A single light. I hadn't used mine most of the trip-preferring to walk the pseudo-journey up the Via Dolorosa in the dimming light as the world shut itself off around me.

Then as we rounded the curve after Jesus was crucified and on the way to see Him laid in the tomb, I realized that the older lady next to me was holding her candle closer to the walkway in an apparent attempt to see so she would not stumble. Immediately I took my candle out of my pocket and turned it on to help.
Unfortunately those candles were made to inspire the soul-not to light darkened walkways. My mind immediately said, "Gee, Stace, fat lotta good your puny little candle did." At that moment from directly behind me, someone turned on a mega-watt flashlight, and the whole walk was clearly visible.

In that instant, I got it. I don't have to light the whole way for those around me. All I have to do is turn my candle on, and Jesus' light will be right there to back me up. I simply must have the courage to believe in His light rather than my own so that I never think that I have to do it all myself. It was a lesson I needed to hear, and one I'm eternally glad He sent me on a walk through the gift He gave me.

~*~*~
Blessings & Peace! Staci

I'll Win It For You

2006-11-21T04:30:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2003

The game was tight. Archrivals had faced off for three and a half periods in a seesaw battle that was going down to the wire. As the clock ticked down, the two sides traded the lead back and forth. Neither could be assured of victory because with the game so close, anything could happen.

From the sideline, the coach watched his team getting more and more apprehensive as the seconds ticked away. They were missing shots they never missed. They were missing opportunities they didn't miss. Even their body language said, "This is bad. We might lose this one."

With less than a minute left, the coach called a time out. Now he knew that every girl on that court had been over the plays a million times. They didn't need elaborate help to set up a play for a last second win. They needed to calm down and play the way they knew how to play. So when they bent into that huddle, the coach told them something more than a little unconventional. "Go out there. Play the game. Have fun. Do your best, and I'll win it for you."

No pressure instructions. No you have to win this or we lose to our rivals. No anxiety-inducing strategy. Simply, "Go play, and I'll win it for you."

To my way of thinking, that was an audacious statement because in reality, it wouldn't be the coach taking the shot that would win or lose the game. He would be standing on the sideline with no direct control whatsoever. However, this coach knew something about the training these girls had been through, and he knew without a doubt they could do it. The problem was they didn't know they could do it, and so, he let them rely not on themselves for the win but on him.

The amazing thing to me when I really started thinking about this statement is that what that coach told his team is exactly what Jesus tells each one of us: "Go out there. Play the game. Have fun. Do your best, and I'll win it for you."

We think it's all on us-that we have to get everything right, do everything perfectly, or our "win" will never materialize. In fact, we get sucked into this mentality that Heaven may be just out of our reach no matter what we do. However, I think the reality is that Jesus is the coach standing on the sideline having full faith that we can do everything He's trained us to do. We can love just like He's shown us. We can give; we can live-not because we can do it on our own but because He's right there, and He has faith that we have been given everything we need to win through Him.

I'm sure you know the end of the story. When the buzzer sounded, the team who had just gone out, had fun, and done their best was victorious.

One day the final buzzer of your life will sound, and the question at that moment will be this: Did you allow Jesus to be your coach? Did have faith that He would win the game for you-or are you still trying to win it yourself? It's a question worth contemplating.

~*~*~
Have a happy and blessed Thanksgiving!

Thoughts on the Road to Emmaus

2006-11-17T04:38:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2003

". . . their eyes were opened, and they recognized him . . ." -Luke 24:31

Two friends-people who had known Jesus, who had walked with Him, talked with Him, and eaten meals with Him every day for three years didn't recognize Him even on a long walk down a dusty road. Have you ever wondered about that? I have. How could that possibly be?

The reality is: the disciples were looking at a man who happened to be traveling along the same road they were. They did not see Jesus because they did not expect to see Jesus.

How many times on our walks through life do we not see Jesus? How many times do we talk with a co-worker or a parent or a child or a friend or even someone we have never met before and fail to recognize that this person holds a precious piece of Our Lord and Savior within them? And because we don't recognize Jesus in them, we treat them not as we would treat Jesus, but as just our friend, or just our co-worker, or just our child.

It must make Jesus terribly sad that for all our flowery words and pious presumptions, we still do not recognize Him in each other.

Moreover, consider this: Is it possible that in religious settings, we look at one another, and instead of seeing Jesus, we see only the other person's religion, their label? And because we don't see Jesus, we say, "You are so obviously not spiritual-look, you stand when we are kneeling, or you use crucifixes instead of picturing the risen Lord, or you pray to statues and icons instead of to the living God, or you don't have our label, and so, obviously God is not going to let you into His kingdom."

Thus, we spend so much time questioning each other's commitment to Jesus and so much time fighting over man-made rules and laws that we forget about those people who are lost and hurting. We forget to do God's real work-ministering to those who are hungry for His word and His truths to come into their lives. Instead, having been seduced by Satan to believe that God's kingdom is some kind of exclusive club, we spend our time fighting with each other about who is going to get in and completely fail to see that the world is going to hell around us.

However, we have the choice to open our eyes and commit ourselves to do God's work here on earth. Rather than judging, we can reach out to the lost souls-not by telling them about God's love, but by showing them how great God's love is. Witnessing by how we live and how we treat one another, so that they look to us and say, "I want to be like them. I want what they have." And then maybe God's grace will touch their hearts and make them ask, "How do I get it? What do they have that I don't?"

But living this way hinges on whether or not we see Jesus in every single person we happen to walk down a path with in our day-to-day lives. When we look at another person, do we see someone who is worthy of Christ's message? Someone whom God loves beyond measure? Do we see Jesus Himself-lost, hurting, and alone? Or do we see just another person.

I tell you truly, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me. -Matthew 25:45
Think about the inherent admonition in these words. Our goal should be to treat others not as we want to be treated but as we would treat Jesus Himself. That is God's real work. We are commissioned to spend our time ministering to God's children-rather than trying to improve our status in His eyes or to impress one another.

By opening our eyes to Jesus' presence in the those around us, we will come to see His spirit manifesting in our own lives. And thus we can say as the disciples did at the conclusion to the Emmaus story,

"Were not our hearts burning within us while He was speaking to us on the road . . ."-Luke 24:32

Open your eyes. This opportunity is with you right now. Don't waste this chance to get to know the Jesus who is in your midst at this very moment.

*~*~*~
Staci has a special project in need of prayers. If you'd like to light a virtual candle in support of this dream to see one of Staci's books on the big screen, go to: http://www.gratefulness.org/candles/candles.cfm?l=eng&gi=cwby Click on a candle and walk through the instructions. I would be honored to have you all praying too!

When Evil Turns

2006-11-14T04:37:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2006

Have you ever noticed how beautiful evil is the first time you encounter it? It looks fun and exciting, like the answer to all of your problems. Whether it's that first drink, that large bag of chips, that joint-or even those less obvious introductions-like that first time a little lie will remedy a situation and "no one will ever know," or that first time tired seems more important than church, or that first time you realize your friends all curse and you join in to feel a part of something. Boy, do you feel big. It's as if for the first time in your life, you finally fit in. Yes, this finally is the answer you've been looking for.

If and when you take that first step toward evil, the next is much easier, and the next easier than that. Evil looks at you softly, knowing it has you already, but wanting only to lead you further, deeper into the darkness. It never shows you the darkness to which you are heading, instead it holds out false light, false beliefs, false hope. It will convince you one experience at a time that yes, indeed you have finally found "the answer." It will convince you that this, finally, will take away all the bad things in your life. It will help you to escape from feeling separated, alone, and scared. It will make you feel like somebody.

Oh, yes. Evil looks beautiful-at first.

I've always sensed this fact. I've always kind of known that evil doesn't look evil the first time we encounter it, the first time it tempts us toward its side. However, that understanding was never put into so concrete terms until I saw "The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe." In the movie, as in the book, the character of Edmund stumbles into the realm of the Witch, who is evil personified perfectly. She is not a hideous, deformed creature. No, she is beautiful in an icy, sinister way.

At their first meeting, the Witch instantly sizes Edmund up as the way she can get what she wants-a way to kill those who are meant to destroy her. But rather than demand anything from Edmund, instead she "sweetens him up" literally. She feeds him beautiful, delicious Turkish Delights. And while she feeds his body empty magic, she feeds his mind empty magic as well. If he will just be on her side, if he will bring his brother and sisters to her, she will not only give him more Turkish Delight, she will make him a king with his brother as his servant.

This, of course, sounds wonderful to Edmund as it does to us. You see for me, the Turkish Delight was success, achievement, and accomplishment; and being a queen meant my work would be recognized and revered. Now, the insidious thing about this for me is that Satan used something that looked holy and good to lead me further onto his side. I was using my writing to serve God. I was working for God. I wanted to be published so I could spread God's word to all the world. Such a noble goal that, and so ultimately hollow and untrue because my efforts were just that mine not His.

"I will give you all of this..." That's what Satan told Christ as they stood on the mountaintop, and that's always where Evil starts with us. He doesn't start at the throw us down on a cross and crucify us part although whether we turn to his side or not, that is always, always where we end up when the world is in charge of things.

You see, Satan doesn't care about us except for how we can help him further himself. (And it is the same with evil people in the world as well.) As soon as we are no longer needed to further his goals and ambitions, we are expendable. Worse, when we realize he thinks so little of us and we try to turn from him, our death and destruction inevitably results from his innate, seething anger and his distrust of us. In fact, he knows better than we do where evil leads-into a selfish, jealous, power-hungry pit of separation, desperation, and fear, and if we continue to follow it, we might even become more evil than he is, and he can't have us be the ruler of his domain. So, our destruction at his hand is inevitable at the outset of his plan. All he really cares about is using us until we are no longer needed to further his purposes.

In the movie, Edmund is taken in by the Witch's treats so much so that he voluntarily leaves his brother and sisters to seek her out. He crosses a great wood and a mountain range to get to her because he believes her to be his only friend. Let me tell you, when Satan convinces you that he is your only friend, you're in serious trouble. Upon entering the witch-queen's palace which is a cold, lifeless place, Edmund is at first afraid. Then he realizes how "superior" he is to those who are now stone statues in the Witch's "kingdom."

It is telling how very few lives there are in her kingdom. Only the three servants who do her bidding are animated with life. That should've been a hint to get out of there, but of course, we always think that we are the favored one of her majesty, Evil. These others were just dumb about it. This could never happen to us. And so we are drawn deeper and deeper into the lies she has us believing are real.

After a heart-stopping moment with the queen's guard, Edmund is led into the queen's throne room, and for one more moment he is allowed to believe the illusion. Symbolically, he walks up to her throne and sits on it. He has done exactly what got Satan tossed from Heaven. He has pictured himself on that throne and wanted it for himself-not for the benefit of anyone else but because it shows his power and his right to be lord over everyone else.

Immediately, however, we see the Witch, the queen herself standing, watching him. She sees Edmund, sitting on her throne, and in that moment, the turn happens. You can see it in her eyes and her countenance as her eyes narrow and her face drops to a malicious scowl. Then, for one more moment, she pulls the illusion of nice back to her as she steps over to him. "Like it?" she asks.

And that is exactly what Satan asks us. "Like it?" Then he smiles because he knows we have truly fallen for the ultimate lie.

Edmund, knowing he has overstepped his place, jumps out of the chair, but it's too late for him. She has him, and she knows it even if he doesn't. The next scene is telling. She questions him about his service for her, and he tries to talk his way out of why he hasn't done what she told him to do. Then, humanly although stupidly, he asks for more Turkish Delight.

The next that we see Edmund, he is literally in shackles and chains. Very poignant symbolism because when we have begun to see evil for what it truly is, we are instantly chained to keep us enslaved to its bidding. To us, these "chains" may look like a lot of things-habits that we can't break, addictions that have a hold on us, friends we don't want to turn our backs on because they've been nice to us in the past, ways of living that are so comfortable that we don't want to risk doing it a different way, guilt for all the things we should have done differently, and the ultimate chain, not seeing that life could ever be any better than it is at that horrific moment.

Edmund is now given not Turkish Delights but stale bread and air for water. He's miserable. He knows he made a huge mistake, but how to get out of it? The saddest component of this part of the tale is how intensely he's trying to do the right thing but how acutely clear it is that HE has to do the right thing. There is no back up. There is no guide. There is no one to help him. Just him and his own resources fighting to do the right thing in the coldest, scariest place in the world.

For me, this moment was when I realized how empty the world's acclaim ultimately was. I had spent two solid weeks traveling to do book signings and appearances only to come home depleted and empty. Whatever book sales were needed to feel "successful" hadn't been met (and no matter how many you sell, you could always have sold more).

Then my publicist emailed telling me she was going to get a copy of the television appearance with the intention of judging my performance. I now see this as the way the world does everything. You have to know what you're doing (even if you don't), and then what you did is picked apart-supposedly to make you better, but we all know the lie that really is. Being picked apart may seem like it works because we've seen people who are pushed to their limits and beyond, who are going on their own power to get better, and it looks like that works. However, I submit to you that the "acclaim" the world holds out as your reward will feel like smoke in your hands if that is all you end up with. And it's not hard to see that if that's all you're going for, that's all you will end up with-even if you get it. That will be all you have to hold onto because that's the way Satan has set it up.

It is at this point in the movie that Edmund is again and again made to look at what he's done to those around him. The faun that Edmund so innocently turned in is brought before him and told of Edmund's betrayal. Edmund's guilt crashes in on him. Then the Witch uses the faun, beating him as Edmund watches to get Edmund's cooperation. By this point, Satan is willing to beat anyone, knowing that on our own we will feel so helpless as to do whatever he asks just to get it to stop.

And then he smiles at our helpless weakness. In minutes Edmund sees that even though he gave the Witch what she wanted to get her to stop beating the faun, ultimately she turned the faun to stone anyway. I think at that point Edmund is beginning to see that this will not end well for him. Going on your own devises, there is no way out once you've sold your soul to evil.

Thus begins a trek through the wood-deeper and darker the world becomes, and when we see Edmund again, he is bound to a tree, defenseless against the jabs and jibes of all the evil around him. He's been beaten, and by now, he knows full-well that he took the wrong path, but still he sees no way out.

Of course the story doesn't end there although in our own lives we often think that it does. No, Aslan, the Christ figure, sends a regiment out to rescue Edmund and bring him back into the fold. In a scene that we watch but never hear, Aslan talks with Edmund who is then released of his guilt in the matter fully.

Aslan tells Edmund's brother and two sisters, "What's past is past. You are not to speak of this to Edmund anymore." There is more to the story that you really should see the movie to understand-Edmund being further used by the Witch, her cruelty and utter contempt for Edmund's soul, her cold need to destroy him, how his soul is eventually ransomed and saved by the only one who can. But that is for another lesson.

For now... After the movie, my friend and I were discussing the meaning of this part, and I asked her, "So, when did evil turn on you?" I asked because this insight of evil being so nice to us and leading us to believe that it will be what saves us until we find out the truth was so clear to me.

Without hardly pause to think, she told me the answer for her. Until the moment evil turned, she had twisted her life to be able to gain her family's love. She had made foolish choices for herself in a vain attempt to get their acceptance. Over and over she had let herself down, pushed herself into a corner, and cowed to whatever guilt trip needed to be taken so that they would notice her and love her. What an insidious way for Satan to work because on the outside, her chains looked so loving and helpful and compassionate. Yet they really were chains.

The moment she described (and like Aslan with Edmund I shall let you see the lesson without hearing the actual words) made her see that killing herself and her spirit to gain their love would never work. Whatever she did, it would never be enough, and thinking that it would was a lie.

The journey back for her has been rocky at times, as it is with all of us. She is still on the path, but now she sees evil for what it really is, and trusting God's love for her and His path for her is getting if not easier, than clearly easier than the alternative. She is a soul who has seen evil for what it will do to you if you believe it and follow it.

As for me, it was less a single moment than a whole string of them that showed me how empty achievement and success by the world's standards are. The glitz and the gold the world holds out are nothing more than a shiny way to get you to walk toward them. When you get them, they are at first smoke and at the end chains that will destroy you if you don't find a way to grab on to the One who is real.

He is what you need. And He is all you need. Once you get that, really get that, then trying to prove yourself and your worth to anyone else simply feels pointless. You have seen evil for what it is, and you no longer need follow its beckoning.

How lucky are you if you are not chained by material things. How lucky are you if you are not addicted to the approval of others. How lucky are you if you do not fall for the delights that the world holds out to you. Yes, how very lucky are you... How lucky are you if you have seen evil turn on you and have used that moment as the incentive to grab onto the only Real Savior of your soul. How lucky are you... How very lucky are you.

~*~*~
Enjoy today!

Are You At Peace?

2006-11-10T04:37:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2003

Everyone is working so hard these days. Getting ahead-that's what most people call it. We've got cell phones, palm pilots, laptops, beepers, and pagers so that we never have to be disconnected from the world. In fact, there's one commercial that shows a man sitting on a mountaintop next to a pristine lake in the middle of nowhere working on his laptop! The tagline says something like: Keeping you connected no matter where you are.

It's a nice idea really-being connected to our fellow beings on the planet all the time, being able to contact practically anybody anywhere any time. In theory it's a nice idea, but in reality, I think that all this busyness is really a mask for something deeper. Being able to "reach out and touch someone" can easily begin to take over every waking hour so that you increasingly do not have time to get in touch with yourself. And that's a problem.

In her book, "A Return to Love," Marianne Williamson talks about goals, but she doesn't jump on the "how-to and why-to" bandwagon that most inspirational authors do. What she says instead is that rather than praying for and focusing our energy on attaining goals that we've set, we should pray for and focus on being at peace no matter what happens.

She's not saying, "Sit on your tail, and do nothing." What she's saying is that because we inhabit such a small speck of this immense universe, we cannot possibly know what is truly best in a given situation. For example, say you want a job with XYZ Company, and you truly believe this job will make you happy-that it is the perfect job. So you pray really hard every night that you will get this job, and you do affirmations 100 times every night, "I will be hired by XYZ Company. I will be hired by XYZ..."

Chances are, because of the power of the mind, you will be hired by XYZ Company. However, as often happens, a year down the road you're miserable and you wish you had never heard of XYZ Company. Why? You got the goal. You got what you wanted. You got what you thought would make you happy. But you missed the opportunity to get what you really wanted, and that was peace about the situation of wanting to work for a great company.

You thought that getting that job would give you peace and happiness, and now you think you were wrong. Have you ever heard the saying, "Be careful what you ask for because you just might get it"? This is the lesson that saying is talking about. You are asking for what you think will make you happy instead of asking God to make you happy no matter what.

Grasping and truly implementing this lesson requires letting go and letting God take over. Trust to the nth degree. It is embodied in the saying a wise friend once told me: "In the end it will always be okay. If it's not okay, it's not the end."

So, pray for peace in your life. You never know. You just might get what you ask for.

*~*~*~
Love, joy, & peace for this beautiful day! Go out and enjoy God's gift to you which is this day!

An Everyday Lesson from a Very Rich Man

2006-11-07T04:41:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

Four years ago I wrote an article called, "Living in God's Hands." It was about how God had led me to a seminar by a man who helped me to learn to market on the Internet. The man's name was Corey Rudl. There was so much to talk about in the story at the time I had to skim over the top of it and hit only the high points. It wasn't until this afternoon when I found out with complete disbelief and grief that Corey had died in a car accident that I took the time to remember the rest of the story. And what a story.

You see, I signed up for one seminar that led to a smaller seminar that Corey was giving. At the time I knew it wasn't unusual for Corey to speak to upwards of 1,000 people in a seminar, but this one was to be very small-only about 25 people. So I was excited to say the least, and I was not disappointed. For three hours we sat riveted as Corey strolled around the room, talking at the speed of lightning. By the end of the first three hours I had 12 pages of notes.

At the lunch break I dashed out and down the block, grabbed something quick, and headed back. We had an hour. It wasn't like I had to rush, but I was afraid my car would break down and I would be forced to walk back. I certainly didn't want to miss anything because I was dilly-dallying around.

When I got back, I was the only attendee in the room with about 40 minutes to spare. Corey and his small staff of about four were still working. Unfortunately something in the computer system had gone wrong, and it wasn't working the way Corey wanted it to work. At the time he was worth in the neighborhood of $20 million. In a suit that could've bought a small island, here he was crawling around on the floor under the tables trying to figure out which cord hooked to which thing to fix the glitch.

As this was going on, one of Corey's staff members, Travis came up and started asking me about my experience-why I was there, if I was getting anything out of the seminar, how many pages of notes I had, what kind of books I write, that kind of thing. Every so often, Corey would pop his head up over the table and ask, "Is lunch here yet?"

Apparently the restaurant they'd ordered lunch from was running behind, and as time dwindled down, their window of time to eat was thinning quickly. The "no" would come from the back of the room, and Corey would say "okay" before diving beneath the table again. This is going to sound unbelievable, and thinking back on it now, it is even to me, but while all of this was going on, Corey was asking me questions as well. He was interested to hear how I had found his stuff, what I thought of it as I read it, what things I had already tried, what things I planned to try. There was no end to the questions!

To this minute I don't know how he did it, but he managed to fix that computer. Lunch arrived, and he inhaled a sandwich and fries. With five minutes to spare, he put on his jacket and was waiting with a smile when the other people came back. I'm sure they never knew the chaos that had surrounded him for the better part of an hour. He looked like peace personified.

Yes, Corey Rudl was a very rich man. To me, he was the servant God gave five talents to, who used them, and they multiplied many fold. In fact, if you are reading this now, you can thank Corey for it because I never could have found you on my own. Corey used the talents God gave him to make his own fortune, and then he willingly passed that knowledge onto others. In fact, when he was married a year ago, he invited all of his subscribers to his wedding-for free. I didn't get to go. I wish I could have.

A huge, sad void has been left in the Internet Marketing world with the passing of Corey Rudl into God's Kingdom, and it has nothing to do with the money he helped anybody make. It has to do with the man he was. The man who had enough money to sit back and do nothing for the rest of his life but instead chose to spend his time crawling around on the floor, looking for the cord that wasn't hooked up properly, waiting for lunch that was late, and doing it with a grace and a peace and a kindness that defy human logic.

Yes, Corey was rich, but it had nothing to do with money. I'm grateful for that lesson and wish only that he could've stayed with us longer to teach me more just like it.

*~*~*
Be sure and check out the Oct. 31 post about the free book. The address will only be up through Friday!

Life Lesson: Be-Do-Have

2006-11-03T04:33:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2002

This revelation hit me the other day while I was listening to a cassette on having financial balance in your life. On the tape, the author talked about a goal setting seminar he went to. The lesson he was revealing is that too often when we set goals, we are setting the "have" part of the equation, then "doing" the work of getting to the goal without ever making the effort to "be" anything.

If you're paying attention, there's a math lesson that translates to this message. Any math person will tell you that there is a definite order to life. A + B = C, and if you get it out of that order, even the simplest of ideas can get overwhelmingly confusing. So this equation must begin with "be" not "do" or "have."

For example, people set a goal of meeting the right person. That is the "have" that they want, so they begin "doing" the things the world says make sense to get to that goal. They go to bars, they go to church, they go to work, they go to parties, they go to school-all with the spoken or unspoken intention of acquiring what they do not have, a partner. Years ago they called the females with this mindset, "Mrs. Majors."
They were not in college to get a degree; they were in college to get a husband.

In today's world some of these types-men and women-have the "have" and "do" parts down to a science. One manifestation of this is the book, "The Rules." This book purports to explain exactly what you have to "do" to get the goal of "having" a mate. The problem is that this is completely senseless when you understand the equation of "be-do-have."

When you truly get this life lesson, it will have a profound impact on every aspect of your life. No longer will you focus solely on the goal-now you will focus on who you must first become, and the attainment of the goals will follow.

I know, it sounds Pollyanna. It sounds so simple. But it's the simple-sounding things that are often the most difficult to actually do. I see this turmoil in teenagers a lot. They think that their identity is created by who they are with, what they wear, what their outward appearance is. The reality, however, is that identity is based on who you are.

That's why you hear of 10- and 20-year high school reunions in which the popular kids are now struggling and some of the most unpopular kids are now the successful adults. When you understand this equation, it makes perfect sense. Think about it. In high school, the "popular" kids already "have." They have the status, the good looks, the admiration of others. Why work for something you already have?

The unpopular kids on the other hand are forced to find their true identity not in the outer world, but in the inner world. So they work on themselves rather than on what the outside world says is important. Thus, 10 or 20 years down the road, they who have been forced to "be" are now "doing" and "having" in much greater proportion than those who "had" everything.

To be sure, this is a vast generalization. There are popular kids who take time out to work on themselves and "become," and there are unpopular kids who want to "have" so badly that they contort who they are trying to fit in. The exceptions are there, but so is the rule.

You have to be before you can do, and you have to do before you can have. If you don't, nothing you ever get will be enough. And if you do, whatever you have will be plenty. With this in mind, find some time today to fit a little "being" time into your "to-do" list. It may just turn out to be the best time investment you could ever make.

Have a great weekend!

Free book from Homeward Bound

2006-10-31T04:41:00.000-08:00

Here it is for all subscribers! To access your free book from Staci, just go to this URL:

http://www.stacistallings.com/PrincessPDF/PrincessPDF3.pdf

Please save this email as it is the only access path to the book. The book will be available until Dec. 15, 2006.

Enjoy!

Peace,

Staci Stallings

Yes, But...

2006-10-31T04:38:00.000-08:00

(c) Staci Stallings 2004

Satan lies. He does. That's what he's good at. He doesn't want you to know the truth. He abhors the Truth, and so he lies. And lies and lies and lies. Some of his lies are directed personally at you. "You'll never make a difference anyway, why even try? You're not good enough. You're not pretty enough. You're not smart enough." All those lies are meant to keep you on the sidelines.

However, there is a more subtle type of lies that I call "collective lies." These are lies that are hard-wired into our culture. "Sex is the ultimate of everything, and it really doesn't matter whom you have to hurt to get it." "Money will automatically make you happy." "Life is a competition, and the only real way to get ahead is to climb over people." Collective lies are aimed at pitting us one against the other so that Satan does have to do anything. When we believe these lies, we do the destroying ourselves.

I am usually on the lookout for Satan's lies. Not that I go searching them out. They usually find me. But I am generally in-tune with what's really going on in many situations and how Satan is trying to sow trouble at every turn. Often, it's in the subtlest situations that he takes a real foothold in a life. For example, a couple gets into a serious conflict because something bad happened to one, and trying not to burden the other, they hold that secret on their heart.

Of course the other feels the secret even if they don't know it, and they begin lashing out in hurt because they don't understand what's really going on. Satan is playing both sides, and everyone is falling for the lies of "this is happening because" when neither party really knows enough information to understand what is truly going on. The collective non-communication lie is: "'I know what's going on' even when I truly don't and can't."

There is a collective lie that I recently uncovered that goes to the heart of this conflict. I call it, "Yes, but..." While discussing a good friend's life situation with my sister the other day, I said, "We all have hurts. We all have pain, and we all have the choice to give that pain to Christ or to hold onto it." To which my sister replied, "Yes, but how can you say that, because you've never lost a sibling like our friend has."

Instantly, although I'd heard similar statements a thousand times and never put it together, I realized how much of a lie that is. Very calmly I replied, "Yes, I have. I lost seven." My mother had seven miscarriages along the way.

That stopped my sister for a moment, and I said, "And you know I very well remember Dad sending me into the house when I was about five years old to check on Mom. She was lying in bed, and at the time I didn't really know what was going on. She didn't even know what was going on. But they had put her on a strong dose of drugs for the physical pain, and it had affected her emotionally. She was crying, and I mean to the point of hysteria. Here I was five years old, and I remember standing by that bed, and all I could do was to put my hand on her shoulder and rub it. That was it. I was helpless.

So yes, in a way I do understand that pain and confusion of losing a sibling-maybe not in the exact same way, but I do understand on some level."

In that moment I saw past the lie the real lie. By saying, "Yes, but..." Satan tricks us into believing two things: 1) we are all alone in our pain because no one could ever understand how much this hurts 2) we don't have to be compassionate with someone else because their pain is not as great as our own.

The reality, the Truth is that we all have pain. We have all experienced it. It may be disease, abuse, violence or alcohol. It may be poverty, helplessness, or hopelessness. It may be that someone or a bunch of someones picked on us in school or at work. It may be that Mom or Dad didn't like you, or liked sister or brother better. It may be that Mom or Dad had such high expectations that you could never reach them. It may be that things were going great and one day the world turned on end because we got sick or someone close to us got sick or someone close to us died. It may be any one of a million different things, but the pain is real because the pain isn't "out there"-it's personal.

All of our individual pains, though superficially different, are in substance the same. They hurt, and they make us have to choose between holding onto the pain and letting go and trusting God. Simple or as difficult as that. So the next time someone is trying to "out-do" your pain, or the next time you catch yourself trivializing someone else's pain (you know the old argument that the crucifixion wasn't as bad for Christ as it would've been for us because He was God and He knew what was coming), stop and realize that Satan is whispering that lie into your ear.

You can believe it if you want to-goodness knows a lot of people do. But you can also reject it, and be compassionate toward the person in front of you (or even toward yourself, with the "this hurts, but I'm being silly because someone over there had to deal with something really bad"). First, stop and hear the lie.

Understand it for the lie that it is. Realize that you don't know all there is to know about the situation and how far down this person's hurt goes, and then empower yourself that you can combat that lie with the Truth that we all have pain, and we can use it to be compassionate or to be competitive. Being compassionate when you understand this principle will let you look at yourself and others in a whole new light, and that's the Truth.

Thy Will Be Done My Way

2006-10-27T15:19:00.000-07:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2005

A good friend of mine was having a meltdown. The problem was she wanted a fellow traveler on life's journey to have the fabulous spiritual experience she'd had on retreat. Unfortunately she'd become convinced that her presence on the retreat team was making that impossible. Duty said she couldn't leave, but her heart said if she stayed, her friend would be so concerned about her being there that she wouldn't open up, that she would stay in fear and isolation, that her life changing experience would be forever ruined.

There was no doubt that my friend cared. Her caring was immensely evident. In fact, when I was informed of the dilemma as one of the retreat services began, she had already secluded herself from the group because she "just knew" she should leave. The tears were flowing. The regret and the guilt were overrunning the banks of her heart and her lashes. First I gave her a hug because I really hate it when Satan uses our best intentions to take a successful whack at our hearts. There are very few things that make me angrier to be honest. She needed a hug, so that was first.

Then gently I explained how Satan was using her best instincts against her, that what she wanted to happen-her friend to have the best retreat possible-was a noble goal. Unfortunately she had been conned into believing that she was who would determine whether or not this would happen. It was heart breaking to watch because she wanted so badly to do what was right, but what was right seemed to lead only to something wrong no matter which way she went.

It became clear as we whisper/talked that the trust she professed to have in God didn't make it all the way to what happens when He puts you in a place that isn't what you expected. I told her it was very possible that her friend needed her to be there, that she needed her presence in order to break through a barrier she wouldn't otherwise have had to face. It was also possible God had set up this very scenario in order to break my friend of the belief that everyone else's happiness, peace, and joy somehow hinged on something she did or didn't do. That seemed a new revelation. Her presence could be helpful-even if it didn't seem that way? Interesting. She might be learning something through this too? What a concept.

I looked at her and said, "It's like you're saying, 'Thy will be done, but it better be done my way.'" She laughed and through the tears she said, "That's a problem?"

Of course I got the joke. I got it because I've been there.

I first remember this lesson coming to me when the desire to publish first lit into my heart. I had by that time become an expert at putting the writing of the books into God's hands. Over and over again He had shown me to trust in His timing, in His way, in His love as I wrote. Pieces would fall into place that I hadn't seen, couldn't have known prior to the moment I most needed them. Words would just come to me, whole scenes, whole books that made sense in a way that I couldn't have planned to save my life flowed from my fingertips. The more I trusted, the better they got.

And then I published, trusting that He would make it the success it was destined to be. However, it quickly became clear that what I thought success would look like wasn't what He had in mind at all. I struggled against this, threw money at it, threw effort at it-all to no avail. Success didn't come any faster nor in any greater degree than it ever had.

In the writing I trusted Him, but when it came to marketing and promotion, it just wasn't progressing the way I thought it would. I often prayed, "Thy will be done..." But it was as if there were limits to what I wanted His will to be in charge of, and let me tell you, His will needed to look exactly like what I thought it would, otherwise that just wasn't good enough.

I don't remember the exact moment when it first occurred to me how ridiculous I was being. I just know I now can't believe how blind I was. I mean come on! Talk about "Thy will be done, but it better be done my way."

Thankfully I have learned to put both the process AND the results into His very capable hands. I've learned to see that His definition of success might at first seem very different than mine, but if I trust long enough, I eventually see that what He had in mind is infinitely better than what I had in mind. In fact, it's become abundantly clear to me how miserable I would have been had my will won out.

When you pray that line in the Our Father... "Thy will be done on earth as it is in Heaven" make sure you're not adding a silent "but it better be done my way" with how you're living your life. I guarantee if you are, no matter which "right road" you decide to travel, it will always turn out to be the wrong one. Thy will be done. Period. Plans, process, results, all of it. Forever.

That's success.

~*~*~
To request a reprint of any Homeward Bound article, simply send the request to staci_stallings @ hotmail.com (put the email address together).

Of Waterpots and New Wine

2006-10-24T04:31:00.000-07:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2006

And on the third day there was a wedding in Cana of Galilee, and the mother of Jesus was there; and Jesus was also invited, and His disciples, to the wedding. And when the wine gave out, the mother of Jesus said to Him, "They have no wine." And Jesus said to her, "Woman, what do I have to do with you? My hour has not yet come." His mother said to the servants, "Whatever He says to you, do it." Now there were six stone waterpots set there for the Jewish custom of purification... John 2: 1-6

There is more of course, but for our purposes we will stop right there. You've probably heard this story more times than you can count. It is of course the story of Jesus' first miracle when He changed water into wine. And not just any wine, no, the best wine. That lesson is for another article, for now I want to focus on the final eleven words of this passage.

Specifically I want to ask you to reread the passage and look closely at what kind of pots they used. In my previous reading of this passage, I had always pictured... well, pitchers. Large earthenware vessels that look like modern day vases. You know the kind you would normally put wine into. But that's NOT what it says! NO. They put it in "stone waterpots set there for the Jewish custom of purification." In the Message Bible it says it this way... "six stone pots, used by the Jews for ritual washings..." Do you know what that means?

Very simply, those pots were used to enforce and carry out the rules, the law, the prescribed way of purifying yourself so you were clean enough to be presentable to society. Ritual washings were one of the biggest outward signs that someone was steeped in the rules of the Jews. There was a prescribed amount of time you had to wash, a prescribed amount of times you had to wash... And Jesus used those pots to do something totally new!

On top of that, the ritual washings were meant to show one's attempt to wash their sin away and thus be pure (If I wash myself enough, if I follow all of the rules, I shall be clean in the eyes of God). But the reality was, people were still dirty. Their bodies were dirty. Their hands were dirty. Their lives were dirty with sins they could not get rid of no matter how many times they washed themselves. And even when they washed, they got dirty again and thus had to wash again.

And Jesus (isn't He awesome?) used the pots that had been used to wash people, pots that symbolize us and our lives (dirty and nasty) to put drinking wine in. That is not just a little inconsequential detail! That's huge!
In fact, upon closer reading, it does not even say that Jesus first said, "Take those waterpots and wash them out, clean them out, and then fill them." No. He said, "Go and fill them." In all the times you have read and heard this passage, have you ever for a second pictured those servants as taking the time to go and wash out the pots on their own?

I haven't because prior to really reading this, I hadn't seen the need for them to. However, at the risk of your lunch, consider what they did. Guests had washed themselves in these pots. We don't know how many guests there were, but I have always pictured a rather large contingent of guests. At very least we know of fourteen, Jesus, the disciples, and Mary. At minimum, that's 28 hands, four for each pot, that have recently been washed in them. Now, Jesus says, "Go and fill those with water," and presumably without the benefit of Dawn Dishwashing Liquid, these pots were filled with water.

Then Jesus said, "Draw some out now, and take it to the headwaiter."

Something tells me, if I was one of those servants, I wouldn't have had the guts to tell the headwaiter what kind of receptacles that wine came from. Of course, we all know that the headwaiter proclaimed that this wine was the finest of wines.

So, consider that in one moment, Christ took us, these waterpots, empty yes, but permanently stained with the dirt of many hands. We had been steeped in the myth that our own actions could somehow wash us clean enough to gain entrance into Heaven. He took these empty, dirty, disgusting waterpots, and He poured Himself (His blood--water made wine) into us, and then he did something new! Not just new wine. The BEST wine! Not the rules. Not our sins. Him. And He is enough to make us THE BEST!

Believe me, I will never mistake those waterpots for pitchers again, nor will I so easily take for granted the mercy and grace He poured into me, dirty from within with no hope to ever get myself clean enough to earn anything. He did not require me to clean up before He washed me with Himself. He didn't look at me and say, "Ew, disgusting. Let's use something else."

Instead, He looked at me and saw not what I had done and what I was, He looked at what He could do. That's the new wine-what He can do in a life, and trust me, it's the best thing you've ever tasted, poor dirty waterpot that you were before He showed up.

*~*
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There's Gotta Be An Easier Way

2006-10-20T14:58:00.000-07:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2003

Have you ever had a dream that was so close you could nearly reach out and touch it? And yet every time you put your hand out, it turned out to be a mirage. You work and work. You put your all into making the dream come to fruition, but when you get to the place where you think you want to be, all you find is more work to do.

I see it with the two college students who work for me and are always hanging out at my house. It seems like they work and work, and yet graduation feels no closer. I see it in my carpenter husband. He stresses out when a job is finishing up because "what are we going to do next?" But he also stresses out when the job is going because "how are we going to get this all done?"

Now I see it in my own life. I set up meetings to talk with people about my books. The meetings always go well-some even go really well. But then, the sales don't come through like I thought they would (read: hoped they would). It's not that God's not on my side. I know for a fact He is because I've seen His hand at work in too many areas of my life to doubt it. Yet I'm still left wondering, why does it have to be this hard?

In thinking about this phenomenon, I suddenly realized that this very feeling is encapsulated in the scene at Gethsemane. Christ is kneeling, praying, and He says, "Father, if it's possible, let this cup pass Me by..." What He's really saying is, "God, listen, please, there's got to be an easier way." He knows what is coming. He knows to the bottom of His soul this is not going to be fun. In fact, I think He's not even totally sure He can pull it off.

Think about it. He's been asked, nae, sent, to save the whole world. That's not exactly a miniscule assignment. On top of that, He knows that in order to accomplish this, He will have to suffer and die-on a cross, beaten bloody, and humiliated. That's not exactly the most comforting thought in the world.

And so, He had to ask God one more time if this plan was really necessary. Apparently the answer was, "Yes, it's necessary." In my mind I can see Jesus say, "Well, okay then." He stands up and walks forward into His future.

Here's the thing though, while we're in "hard," it's tempting to give up. It's tempting to say, "This isn't worth it" and walk away from God's ultimate dream for us. But if we do... if we walk away because it's too hard... we will miss the glorious resurrection day. We will miss that day on which God takes our dream, molds it into His vision and releases it to the world in a burst of golden light.

Sure, it could be easier, but then the triumph of our Easter Sunday wouldn't be met with such rejoicing. And who knows, if we didn't go through our Good Friday, Easter might never come at all.

~*~*~*~
Do you love Staci's articles? Get 52 in "Reflections on Life." It makes a great birthday present, Christmas present, or just a pick-me-up for stress-filled day. Go to: http://www.lulu.com/spirit-light You'll feel better for the experience!

Prove It!

2006-10-17T08:32:00.000-07:00

(c) Staci Stallings, 2002

You are of God, little children, and have overcome them, because He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world. -1 John 4:4

We all know the types, those people we encounter on a daily basis who feel they have to prove to everyone around them how important they are. They may be a boss, a co-worker, a spouse, a child, a friend, or just someone we happen to know. But whoever they may be, they have a way of getting under our skin with their constant need to make everyone else know they are not to be taken lightly.

I call this the "I-am-important-because..." syndrome. Now, of course, there are a myriad of ways to fill in the blank inherent in that statement. I am important because... I have money, I have power, I have the right car or the right clothes, I pay for dinners or gifts, my name is this, my skin color is that, I have x number of kids, or ex-husbands, or bank accounts, I am a banker, lawyer, teacher, businessman; I give to charity; I'm saved, I'm a (fill in the blank), Catholic, Church of Christ, Mormon, Baptist, Methodist, Pentecostal, etc. or I'm not a (fill in the blank), Catholic, Church of Christ, Mormon, Baptist, Methodist, Pentecostal, etc., I went to college, I have a house on the lake, and on and on and on...

Look closely, and you will see that all of these statements have one thing in common: they are all designed to separate the speaker from the listener. They are designed to divide. Division is the goal of the ego. It says, "For me to have worth, I must diminish your worth." To me, there is no greater destructive force on earth than this mentality, and yet it runs rampant in our society.

In contemplating the storyline of a book that I wrote and trying to find ways to describe the undercurrents that run through the book, I realized that this is exactly what the characters are doing. The two main characters, Jaxton and Ami, are in an all-out battle with themselves to prove that they are in fact worth something to themselves, their families, and to the world. Because of this, even small tasks that they undertake become massive struggles.

One character, Jaxton, follows the "I am important because I have power" line of thinking. He uses that power to walk over people repeatedly. Truth be told, he himself has been walked over and dismissed by his own family, and he is desperate to prove to his ego that he is worth something.

Ami, on the other hand, is a young woman reaching for a dream that she knows will never come true and thus will only prove once and for all that she is exactly what she feels she is in her heart: a failure. Against the persistent drag of the rational side of her ego, she works determinedly to the point of exhaustion trying to prove that her dreams matter, that she deserves to be successful, that she can make something work. The only problem is, she doesn't really believe this although she does her very best to prove to everyone around her that it is in fact the truth.

There is a counter-point character to these two, Jaxton's grandfather. Once I started thinking about him, the answer of why he was so different stood out clearly. He doesn't answer, "I am important because..." Instead, he has come to the realization that, "I am important." (Period.) And his actions are a consequence of that thinking (not the means to prove it).

He is generous not to prove how wonderful he is but because it's a natural outgrowth of the fact that he wants to share what he has with others. He is helpful and kind not so that others will be impressed but because that is what's in his heart, and there is a big difference.

When I was a teacher, there were always students who were less than respectful to the faculty and administration. I would see my fellow teachers go into fits of rage that these students would not give them the respect they deserved. To be honest, these students rarely bothered me. Why? Because my worth was not tied up in what they thought of me. I knew that as a child of the Most High God, I had worth, and I was important--regardless of what they thought.

We are not trying to please people, but God... --1 Thessalonians 2:4

The other side of this coin is that I did not have to prove my worth to anyone. I wasn't on a power trip like some of my fellow teachers. I didn't have to run a student down to make myself feel better. I didn't have to control students to prove I was a great teacher. I was there to help a student begin where they were and reach for the highest accomplishments they could achieve.

That mentality made me a successful teacher, but now I realize how it works in my life every day even now that I am no longer in the classroom. My marriage is stronger because of it, and it is only when I delve into trying to prove how "important I am" that life goes off track. In my business, my employees don't have to tiptoe around wondering if they are going to hurt my feelings or provoke me because my feelings and moods are not based on external influences. They are based on the fact that God thinks I'm all right, and I don't have to prove that to anyone else.

My son, with humility have self-esteem; prize yourself as you deserve. Who will acquit him who condemns himself? Who will honor him who discredits himself?
--10 Sirach 26-27

So, I challenge you to look around your life. In what areas are you fighting to prove you are worth it? And who around you is doing the same thing? For both sides, there's a simple answer to get out of the cycle of division and destruction. It is this: I am important, and so are you. Period. Work toward that, and you will be amazed at the peace that will befall the world you live.

*~*~*~*
Want to meet Ami and Jaxton? Check out Staci's "The Long Way Home" at: http://www.stacistallings.com/bookshelf.htm

Peace and Grace to all! May God bless you now and always. Staci

It's Not Up to You

2006-10-13T08:23:00.000-07:00

(c) Staci Stallings

The ego in us tells us that we have to do it-whatever "it" happens to be. It may be working or finding work, or studying or practicing, or learning an instrument or learning anything. "It" could be a lot of things, but the biggest lie in this life is that "it" is up to us to do.

In the book "Grace Rules" by Steve McVey, Mr. McVey leads with an interesting scenario of Jesus waking up in the morning and deciding what He was going to do for God today. In the story, Jesus decides that it would be a good thing to do a few miracles because that would get some attention, and casting out some demons might also be a good attention getter. The essence of what Mr. McVey was trying to say is that if we look to Jesus for our example, then our "planning" our day is completely ridiculous.

After reading Mr. McVey's first book "Grace Walk," I realized I'd been doing exactly that. I had yellow notebooks filled with to-do lists. As I looked back on them, they were always the same thing with only a few variations. Pay bills, write article, work on website, etc. Over and over until you would've thought I had it memorized. There were also things on those lists that I didn't get to, things that had never been crossed out.

I told a friend of mine after seeing what I had been doing that I now understood why I was always so frustrated. If I put ten things on the list in the morning, inevitably by two, there were five more things to add. By the time I quit at six, I had added another six or eight things. So in addition to not getting all of the things I had written down at the first of the day done, now I had 14 more things to do. And it was like I was on a squirrel wheel going round and round and round. Sure I had good intentions of doing what I was doing for God. I even put things in His hands when they seemed overwhelming, but it never occurred to me to put the whole day in His hands and let Him decide what we were going to do.

The first day I did that was the most empowering day of my life. For years I had worked to position myself as someone who could help other authors with marketing. It never worked. It was as if no one else cared about marketing, which of course is completely ridiculous, but that's the way it felt.

Then that day, I let go and let God. In the course of about five hours suddenly people were asking my opinion on these matters from so many different directions I could hardly keep up, but of course, I didn't have to. During that day my email program totally shut down twice. Most days I would've been freaking out. That day, I said, "Okay, God, then what am I supposed to do?"

Instantly a thought would come to me. That day-in one day-I helped four different people with their marketing, replied to every email that came my way, exercised, vacuumed my kitchen, sent in my tax information, wrote letters and got them mailed, played with my kids in the backyard, sent my newsletter out, read for 30 minutes, listened to a tape, took my kids to school, went and picked them up from school... It was as if I would think of it, and it would do itself.

And the cool thing is, it continues to be that way. I've been "redirected" many times. In fact this article is a redirect because what I was going to work on, I couldn't find. So let God decide your "it," and let Him decide when and how that will look. In short, let Him do it through you. You will be amazed.

*~*~*~*
Reprints of any and all Homeward Bound articles are available. Just email Staci at: staci_stallings @ hotmail.com (Put the address together!). Peace to all, Staci.

The Rules

2006-10-10T08:04:00.000-07:00

(c) Staci Stallings

There are at least two versions of the Ten Commandments. Did you know that? There is a Protestant version and a Catholic version. I didn't know that until about two years ago while watching a video for kids on the Ten Commandments, I suddenly noticed their numbers were off. Five was suddenly something I didn't recognize. Oh, no wait. I did recognize it, but it wasn't five. Of course, I thought they'd made a mistake. I mean it took me a long time to memorize those commandments in order, so if I was right, then they had to be wrong. Right?

It now amazes me how focused on the rules we as Christians are. We learn them, teach them, memorize them, and then proceed to use them to bop each other over the head with them.

While shopping at a Christian bookstore this afternoon, my ears suddenly caught on an angry voice at the main counter. As I listened, it became very clear this gentleman had found something wrong in the store because he was demanding that they take the offending item off the shelf. The manager calmly explained that first he didn't have the power to do that and secondly the item was based on a certain version of the Bible.

Now, I'll admit I'm not a Biblical scholar. I know the Catholic version adds like five books toward the beginning, but other than that, if I simply picked a version off the shelf, I couldn't tell you what version it was. So, the two men proceeded over to the Bible shelves, which happened to be right next to where I was shopping.

Having gone through this fruitless exercise myself, I knew what they would find. There are no numbers to the commandments as listed in the Bible. Sure enough, the man said, "Well, all the words are there, but they combined this first one and then chopped the last one into two. That's not right. I want to talk to the store owner."

The manager had no choice. He got the store owner. In minutes they were back. The store owner said that the salesman she had purchased the posters from had explained that the poster he now held was the Catholic version of the Commandments. Well, that was just ridiculous. The Commandments were the Commandments. They don't change. Do they?

I seriously considered stepping in but decided against it. I'm sure you're asking, "Why? You should step in and defend your faith." Ah, but I wouldn't have been defending my faith. I would've been defending my religion. And the difference is gaping.

You see, my faith is that I believe God is right in my heart every minute of every day. My faith says His Spirit guides my every step. My faith says He loves me no matter what, and I am only to follow His voice and let Him lead. My religion says the Commandments are supposed to be numbered a certain way. My religion says this is the code you must follow to be considered a member of this religion.

There was a time when my religion was more important to me than my faith because I really didn't understand the difference. Now I do. So, to me, it really doesn't matter what order we put the rules in. What matters is how we are living our lives every moment of every day. The very real question you have to ponder is this: Is my faith about the order of the rules, or is it about God? Once we get that in order, we can stop arguing about what Number Five is because it won't matter anymore anyway. But it is interesting how indignant we become when somebody goes changing the rules we've learned on us. I mean, goodness, when you're living by the rules, it's hard enough to get it right even when they don't change!

*~*~*~*~*

When was the last time you visited Staci's website? It's chocked full of interesting and valuable insight. Check it out today! http://www.stacistallings.com You'll feel better for the experience!

Perfection-The Lie That Binds

2006-10-06T07:34:00.000-07:00

(c) Staci Stallings

I don't care who you are, you know that perfection stinks. If you are a perfectionist, you know as well as I do that no matter how hard you try, nothing is ever right enough. If you get within two feet of perfection in one area, there are three more areas on the other side of the room to show you how imperfect you really are. Maybe, however, you are on the other side of that sword. Maybe you know someone who is perfect (not really, but they sure put on a good show). Of course, when you are around them, you can't help but feel less than no matter what you do.

Perfection is a piece of baggage I carried for a long time. It was heavy, and it was bulky. No matter what I did, how successful I was, I still heard Satan whispering, "Yes, but it isn't perfect." Of course, it wasn't perfect. God didn't make us perfect. If He had, there would've been no need for the cross and Calvary. In fact, I think that even Adam and Eve weren't perfect. I think even they had flaws, but before the fall, they also had something else-a deep understanding that God loved them just as they were no matter what.

I think that is one of the heaviest bags a perfectionist carries-the belief that no one could really love them if they aren't perfect. They spend their lives with their spirits in chains because of this. They hold onto the core belief that even God could not love someone so flawed. With this belief dogging their heels, they do their absolute level best to convince the world that they have no flaws.

Floors? They are spotless. Kids? They don't make mistakes. Dress? Ironed, pressed, creased. Life? In hand down to the last minute. They have no worries, no fears, no problems.

In truth, fear is what drives their lives. Fear makes every decision, says every word, dictates every action.

That's what non-perfectionists looking in do not see. They do not see the fear, and so they assume there isn't any. They assume that there must be something wrong with them because they do feel fear. They assume that somehow they are less than because they can't be perfect like X.

Lies. It's all lies. Hideous, odious, spirit-crushing lies all around.

Dragging perfection through life is a cross that keeps getting heavier and heavier because the perfectionist can never be real. They can never let others see the truth because they know their perfection is a lie. So on top of perfection, the lies start building. To those looking on, these lies only exacerbate the guilt they feel, and so the lies add weight after weight to them as well.

There is a way to break through these lies, but it's not easy. It takes the perfectionist admitting first to him or herself and then to others that they are not perfect. It is letting others see that their house isn't always in perfect order, that sometimes they are unorganized, that they have fears and worries just like everyone else. For those looking on, this requires being a soft place to fall, reiterating to the perfectionist that they are loved no matter what.

Either one can start the process but it takes both to make it come full circle. The perfectionist must admit they are not perfect, and the others must admit that's okay. It's worth the work if you can ever get past the fear of jumping into real and leaving the fiction of perfection behind.

*~*~*~*
If you're looking for something GREAT to read, jump on over to Staci's website and read the first three chapters of "Lucky" free! http://www.stacistallings.com/LuckyPreview.htm You'll feel better for the experience!

Expendable

2006-10-03T07:18:00.000-07:00

(c) Staci Stallings

God did not make Hell. Satan did. Just as God did not choose the crime and violence in our world, we did, so the fact that there is a Hell doesn't mean God's the one who made it.

Like us, Satan was created to be creative, and he certainly is that. God is love. God is open and loving. God never had in mind anything but love. However, Satan decided that love was not enough. It was not enough to be in heaven with God. He wanted more, and he was going to get more. He wanted to be the ruler of his own world. He wanted to be in control. He wanted to be the Prince of something even if that something was Darkness. That way everyone would know how wonderful he is.

I've always said that real cool doesn't have to try to be cool, nor does it have to convince anybody that it is cool. Cool is just cool. That's God. He just is. He doesn't have to "try" to be awesome. He just is awesome, and that drives Satan completely crazy with jealousy.

So Satan's goal is to convince us that God wants nothing more than to throw us into the pit of fire forever because we haven't lived up to God's expectations of us. This of course is ridiculous. God loves us so much He sent His only Son to suffer the pain of our sins in our place so that we could live with Him for eternity. I don't know about you, but I can't think of a better example of love. And yet, Satan would like nothing more than to convince us that God's sword of wrath and justice are hanging over our heads every moment as He waits for us to make a mistake, so He can gleefully banish us forever.

The truth is that's Satan's M.O. not God's. Just like so many other things that Satan tells us, this is a lie. You see, where God is love; Satan is leering jealousy and malevolence. He doesn't only want to see us fall, he wants to see us fall hard. The harder we fall, the more pleasure he takes in it. Our downfall is his warped idea of victory. And as it is with Satan, so it is with the world.

If you let it and you don't know this secret, the world will build you up, make you believe it loves you just so it's more fun to watch you fall. One of the most deeply held secrets of Satan is that he believes we are all expendable. At this moment we may be on top of the world. We may be at the top of the ladder, but the reality is that in some tomorrow to come, it will be gone for us, and Satan will not bat an eyelash as we dissolve into tears of disappointment, defeat, and despair because the world no longer assures us that we're great or that we're even needed any more.

Look around. You can see it in the downsizing phenomenon and the outsourcing trends. Workers are no longer people. They are numbers, and when the numbers don't add up, you're gone. There are those who will tell you that as they get older, it is more difficult to keep the job they've had. Why? Because to the world, they are expendable. When they get too old, it is time to move on to someone with more years of usefulness to exploit.

In our culture today, everyone seems to be expendable. Husbands. Wives. Families. Children. Workers. Bosses. Even friends. Notice the divorce rate, the growing number of broken homes, the anxiety over job security. If you fail, if you are ever seen to be human, you are at risk because to the world, you are expendable.

Oh, its true that the world will act like it likes you when you are "hot." Like when you land that incredible job with the big, fat pay raise. The world will court you like a smitten suitor. It will act like you are the most wonderful thing ever to occupy space under the ozone layer until the moment you are no longer useful, and then it will be as if it never so much as heard of your name.

Years ago, I taught high school for three years. During that time I did my level best to give everything to the school. I showed up early. I went home late. I taught six different classes, ran the newspaper and the yearbook, helped with student council, and the drama club. When I discussed my departure with the principal due to pregnancy, she said she hated to see me go and that she wished I could stay. She didn't know how she could ever replace me.

I had done a lot for that school One of the things I did was update the senior plaques for the two years prior to my arrival and the three years I was there. The next year I walked into that hallway again, and you know what? Life had gone on without me. There was a new plaque of the new seniors-one that had been done without me. Four years later only two of the office staff even remembered who I was. That's not bad. It's just the way it is.

To the world, you are expendable, but to God you are simply irreplaceable. He wants us with Him more than anything in the world. He loves us beyond all telling. And yet, we spend all our time striving to convince the world that we are what they need, that we are worth their love, that our place can never be taken by anybody else. We twist ourselves into pretzels trying to make them love us when the reality is-they will NEVER love us. The love of the world is hollow and empty. And the world knows that truth better than you do. The world knows you are expendable. More than that, the world believes you are expendable. To them, you are.

So the question becomes are you spending your time fighting to make the world love you, or are you using your time to get better acquainted with the One who already loves you? It's worth considering.

*~*"~*
Love Homeward Bound? Then you'll love Staci's book of insights and thoughts just like these. Check out "Reflections on Life" at http://www.lulu.com/spirit-light You'll feel better for the experience!

Love and Dust

2006-09-29T14:46:00.000-07:00

© Staci Stallings

I’ve been a Catholic all my life, so at present I’ve personally heard the Ash Wednesday admonishment 37 times. As the ashes are placed on your forehead, you are told, “Remember you are dust and to dust you shall return.”

About three weeks ago, I was writing a book, and the character remembered what her grandmother used to tell her: “Remember you are love and to love you shall return.”

When I went to Ash Wednesday Mass, I thought about these two sayings and wondered how can one be true if the other is also? Did I have to disregard the first’s warning in order to embrace the second's promise? All day long I thought about it, and finally it dawned on me what God was telling me through these two sayings.

Too many of us on this earth believe that what we do is important. We strive to “make a difference” in our world. We pursue educations and then jobs so that what we do will matter. Unfortunately, we’re missing the point.

It is not what we do that matters. It’s what He already did. The day that Christ carried my sins up Calvary’s mountain, allowed Himself to be nailed to a tree, bled, suffered and died for me—that’s what matters, and in truth, that’s all that matters. Whether I get my living room cleaned or not is really inconsequential in comparison.

“Remember you are dust and to dust you shall return.”

Remember that those things you are doing today to increase yourself are dust. As the writer of Ecclesiastes says, they are smoke.

However, and here is where life gets interesting, you do not have to be dust. You do not have to resign yourself to smoke. In Christ, through Christ, you can have love. You can be love if you will retrain your focus from yourself to Him. Do you let Him order your day, or do you insist on planning your own? Do you let Him control you, or do you seek to control Him—putting Him off until prayer time for example? Do you turn your God walkie-talkie on and listen for His messages to you, or do you do like a friend of mine who said, “I thought we just lived. I didn’t know there were lessons!”

There are ultimately two things in this life: Love and Fear. Fear is an illusion, a lie of Satan. Love is real. Love is all that is real. Everything else is dust.

When the great entrepreneur J.D. Rockefeller died, a reporter asked his accountant, “How much did J.D. leave behind?” To which the accountant replied, “All of it.” He left the dust of this world behind and took only the love he had for God and for others to his eternity.

As my sister said, “All we get to keep is the love we have shared with others, with God, and with ourselves.”

So, I wonder how often I am dust and how often I am love. Reality is, I can be either one.

The priest on Ash Wednesday pointed this out very nicely. He said (I paraphrase), “Which is it? The Bible says not to hide your light under a bush, but then it says, ‘When you do a good deed, don’t let your left hand know what your right hand is doing.’ It says, ‘Feed my sheep,’ but it also says, ‘What you do in secret, your Father sees.’ So which is it?”

I propose to you this points out the dust or love question nicely for the reality is, it is BOTH and it is NEITHER. Both when why you are doing it is for love. Neither if you are doing it for yourself. Pride is the first deadly sin for a reason. Pride in self and your own accomplishments will get you a handful of dust in a hurry.

When you are working from love and really letting Christ work through you in love, it matters not if your actions are public or private—they are blessed because God blesses what is Holy. If He did it, it’s Holy. If you did it (even for Him), it is not. God does not bless our effort if our effort is motivated by our own self-interest (and that might even mean if we’re trying to get into Heaven because of it).

For example, let’s say that you decide: In order to get to Heaven, I have to read my Bible every night and visit the sick once a week. So you read your Bible every night and you visit the sick once a week. Your goal in both exercises is your own benefit—you’re doing them to get to Heaven (or if you’re a fear-based Christian to save yourself from Hell). The problem is this is smoke and will count for naught on the other side.

Now, let’s say instead that a stranger has dropped his books all over the sidewalk. You are in a hurry to get to work, but you stop and help him because he needs help. I submit to you, that this action will survive the grave and accompany you to Heaven. You have extended love, and love lasts. Yes, it was a small thing, took no more than two minutes, but I believe it will outweigh all those other things you did in order to gain something for yourself.

Look for those moments to give love to someone else. Look for those moments when listening is all that is required. Look for those moments when Christ nudges you to help, to listen, to answer, to hear, to run, to walk, to be. Let God who ordered the whole universe order your day as well. Let love be your guiding light and realize that everything else is dust.

The more you remember you are love and to love you shall return, the more you will be living with Christ as your focus and with God in your heart. Those are the things that matter. Get that right, and everything else will follow.

~*~*~*~

If you are enjoying these articles, there's more where they came from... Visit http://www.stacistallings.com You'll feel better for the experience!

The Four Parts of a Blessing

2006-09-26T07:37:00.000-07:00

© Staci Stallings

One of the stories in the Bible that always fascinated me was the story of the small boy who had five loaves and two fish. Can you imagine being that kid? His mother, I’m sure, packed his lunch for him that morning. “Now, be careful with this. Don’t smash that bread, and no trading with anybody!” So, off he goes to see this guy they call Jesus.

Jesus talks, and then it’s time to eat. Think about this, there were 5,000 men there—which may mean there were many more than that when you count the women and the children—AND NO ONE THOUGHT TO BRING ANYTHING TO EAT EXCEPT THIS ONE KID! Okay, this is not Kansas City, Missouri. There isn’t a McDonald’s five blocks down from the convention center where Jesus is speaking. They are out in the middle of the country, and they came out here with no food.

I think it’s quite possible the people who came to hear Jesus speak may not have realized that’s where they were headed that day. Maybe they were headed further down the road to work or coming back from visiting someone. They saw this crowd and thought, “Hmm, wonder what’s going on over there.” So, they pulled the camel over and went to see what was up.

They didn’t intend to stay so long. They had fully intended to only stay a minute to see what was happening. But Jesus was a dynamic speaker. I’m quite sure He was a dynamic spirit—one of those people that you’re just drawn to and you can’t really explain why. So, He’s teaching, and they’re listening, and the crowd is growing. Then all of a sudden one of the disciples realizes, “Hey, man, we haven’t eaten in like hours!”

So, he goes up to Jesus and says, “Tell these people to go home. We need to go get something to eat.” To which, Jesus turns to him and says, “Feed them yourself.”

Okay, I’ve been to enough “community events.” As the day winds down, if you’ve had a good day, the meat is running a bit thin, we’re out of potatoes, and I really hope we don’t get many more people coming in. These things go through a person’s mind when they are in charge. I’m quite sure they went through this disciple’s mind as well.

But Jesus said to feed the people, so what do they do? The only thing they can do… They start looking around for any food available. That’s when one of the disciples sees this boy. With very few other options, they ask him for his lunch. Probably knowing his mother will be mad but seeing little other choice, he gives them the food he has.

You know the rest of the story. Jesus takes the meager offering, blesses it, has it distributed, and it feeds the multitude. This is exactly how the blessings in our lives work if we understand what really happened here.

The boy most likely did not make that bread himself, nor did he make the fish. He was given them—by his mother, yes—but even more so by his Heavenly Father. They were his blessing. Now he could’ve kept that blessing to himself, but he didn’t. When he was asked, he gave his blessing away. He gave that blessing to Jesus. Jesus took the blessing that had been given the boy, blessed it, and it was distributed as a blessing to all those present.

Think about what Jesus is calling us to do through this story with the blessings and talents in our own lives. He has given them to us, and we can keep them to ourselves if we wish. But I think He is inviting us to see what can happen when we don’t keep them to ourselves. When we give them back to Him and let Him bless them, and then we share them with the world. It becomes not two fish and a few loaves of bread—a small, hardly-worth-mentioning offering—it becomes “enough to feed a multitude.” And there’s even 12 baskets leftover.

Yes, we can keep our talents and blessings to ourselves. We can hold them close to our hearts and horde them so that they don’t slip through our fingers. However, consider how incredible that blessing could become if we give it back to Jesus, let Him bless it, and then Him, through us, use it to improve the world around us.

It’s something to think about.

~*~*~*~
Share "Homeward Bound" with your friends! Just click the little letter below and type in the address of anyone you think would be blessed by this article. It's a great way to say, "I'm thinking of you and wishing you a blessed day!"

Don't miss the previews of Staci's newest releases Cowboy and Lucky. Read the first three chapters of either one (or both!). Visit: http://www.stacistallings.com/Previews.htm You'll feel better for the experience!

~*~*~*~

Subscribe to Homeward Bound at: http://stacistallings.blogspot.com You'll feel better for the experience!

Layers of Existence

2006-09-22T14:19:00.000-07:00

© Staci Stallings

Movies are fascinating. They have a way of conveying messages without us realizing we are getting the message. I first gained this understanding in college. I took a cinema class because I thought it would be fun and easy. But God had other plans.

There were 800 students in cinema class. Apparently a lot of people had the same idea I did. The only one in the room who didn't know this was supposed to be easy was the teacher. She had this strange idea that we were actually there to learn about movies. Go figure!

Where we started, I no longer remember, but through the course of the semester we learned every technique directors use to pull us into their work. We went through the meanings of various camera angles, how props are used, how sets are designed, how costumes are chosen, colors, music, layout, dialogue, blocking, movement, and on and on and on.

We were given the chance (read: assigned) to deconstruct various techniques in movies we watched. For example, say you chose to analyze the music, you then took notes on how music was used throughout the movie to evoke the emotion you had decided the director was trying to bring out. Then you wrote what you thought about that in a 500-word paper.

It was fun. Slowly but surely the lessons came together so that I could see how a movie director constructs a world in which what you see and hear transfers into making you feel a certain way and understand the characters on a deeper level than maybe even you realize. Does he want you to feel fear? Low, menacing music will pull fear right out of you. Does she want you to sense that a character is out of control? Cluttering the character's living space with a myriad of props will (even if you're not aware of it) add to that perception.

Many years after the cinema class, I began to use these lessons in constructing my books. I intuitively understood that you didn't have to tell the audience a character was a control freak if his suit was impeccable, his desk perfect, his apartment sparse but in fastidious order, his commands to others followed to the letter or else. All of these add up to a character bent on controlling his existence-even if I never said that outright.

I could do that without even really trying. It wasn't until a writing friend pinned me down to explain it to her that I came to the realization of the layers of existence.

Simply put: What happens in the physical realm gives us cues to what is happening on the emotional and mental levels, which then have an underlying lesson in the spiritual realm. Now, stay with me here. This isn't hard, and it will make a tremendous difference in how you live your life once you get it.

For a long time I saw this pattern in books, but it wasn't until recently that I discovered it transfers to life as well. When things happened in real life, I began to ask, "Why?" just as I did when writing my books. Not in a negative sense as in "Why does this always happen to me?" but in a curiosity sense, "Why? What does this mean? Where are we going with this?"

That opened up a whole new understanding of life for me. I began to see how what happens in the physical realm necessarily opens a window to understand the emotional, mental, and spiritual realms.

An example that happened recently was a friend of mine who was talking about a control freak in her life. She lamented that he always has to be right, he wants everything perfect or it's horrible, and he makes her the "small one" so he can be the savior. Listening I said, "You know why, right?" She paused. "No. Why?"

"Because he feels out of control and less than, so he's holding the things he can control in a tight fist. That helps him feel like he's in control so he doesn't have to feel out of control." After only a moment's thought, she said, "You know what? You're right. I never thought of it like that."

You see, what was happening in the physical realm-his controlling behavior-held cues to his emotional and spiritual state of being wanting at all costs to feel in control of everything.
It happens with lessons as well. As things in real life happen, I often step back and ask, "Okay, what's the lesson in this?" Invariably as the layers peel away, the lesson becomes clear. In fact, a friend of mine who has recently begun doing this commented the other night:

"I used to think things just happened, and that was that. Now, I stop and think, 'Okay. Wait. There's a lesson here. What is it?' It takes me awhile sometimes, but when I really stop long enough to look, the lessons become clear."
I'm glad I took that cinema class because it taught me more about life than I ever would've guessed.

(For Reprints of articles on Homeward Bound, visit: http://www.stacistallings.com/articlepermission.htm )

Decide

2006-09-19T14:04:00.000-07:00

© Staci Stallings

The genesis for my understanding of this word goes back to when I was teaching high school English. The school where I taught had a unique way to teach vocabulary. It was based entirely on learning the meanings of Greek and Latin root words. Now I have no idea how much that helped the kids, but it sure helped me.

When you deconstruct the word "Decide", you come up with two parts: de- and -cide. De means "away from" in Latin - as in destroy, devalue, detour, or diverge. Cid or cis means "to cut", as in incision.

Putting the two together, you get "to cut away from".

Now I had known this for a long time and always thought it fascinating. But it wasn't until I was talking with a friend of mine about a friend of hers that I realized how much understanding this could help others.

My friend was telling me how her friend just didn't get it. He refused to put things in God's Hands because he "didn't know how." I told her that what he (or anyone) has to do is to decide to do it - to put life in God's Hands. Then I said, "You know what decide means, right?'

That stopped her. No she didn't.

I deconstructed decide for her and then said, "To decide means to cut off all other possibilities." For example, let's say you decide to have hamburgers for supper. As soon as you decide, you literally cut yourself away from all other possibilities - brisket, sandwiches, steak, seafood. The others are now no longer options because you have decided to have hamburgers.

It works the same way in the spiritual realm although it's much less easy to see and therefore easier to let the important decisions slide.

Going to church, for instance. Have you ever really decided that church is beneficial for you - or do you just go because you're supposed to? How about having faith that the best outcome in God's eyes will happen? That's not an accident. It's a decision - where you literally cut yourself off from all other possibilities.

Deciding can be one of the most life-changing things you ever consciously do. It is like pruning a grapevine. If you let the vine go, it will be one big jumbled mess and produce very little fruit. But if you prune it, cutting away that which is simply in the way rather than productive, the good branches will have the chance to produce richly.

So today when you make a decision about what to wear or how to spend you time, do it wisely and do it well for all the possibilities are available to you until the moment you decide. And once you decide, all the non-productive branches fall away - if you have decided wisely!

~*~*~
Lucky is here! Staci's latest novel which Chandra Lynn Smith calls Lucky "a love story woven like a fine tapestry tells the story of Kalin Lane, a singer/guitarist on the cusp of stardom if he can just outrun the demons of his past. Read the first three chapters of Lucky free by going to: http://www.stacistallings.com/LuckyPreview.htm

A Reason to Pray

2006-09-15T13:49:00.000-07:00

© Staci Stallings

Recently I was reading Nancy Stafford's "Beauty by the Book." She pointed out something I hadn't thought of. Words associated with Christ often start with the prefix re- as in renew, refresh, restore, resurrection. Words associated with Satan, however, often start with either de- or dis- Destroy, discourage, disappoint, despair, depression. Re- means to bring back to the original state. Even though as a root word de means "of" as in desire-of the Father; as a prefix de- or dis- means away from, down, or separation or negation, which pretty much describes Satan.

Of course you know this to be true in your own experience. When you're with Christ, you feel a sense of rebirth and rejuvenation of your soul. When you're hanging with the devil, there's a lot of disease, disappointment, disillusionment, distrust, despair. You know the signs when the devil is working on you. Now you can let that disempower you-as he is trying to do. In fact, Ms. Stafford sums up Satan's agenda in one very powerful sentence. "His sole purpose is to isolate and destroy us, either emotionally or physically." That's about as succinct a goal statement for Satan as I've ever read. Isolate and destroy. And I'm quite sure you know how that feels.

So, like I said, you can use the knowledge that Satan is working to destroy you as a reason to give up, quit,
surrender, and let him take you down. Or, you can recognize what's going on and use it as a reminder to fight back.

Now you and I both know that Satan is a wily little booger who will use our greatest weaknesses to crack us in two-or several hundred pieces. We also know that on our own fighting him, we are sunk. That's why at some point in the past we accepted Christ's work on the cross on our behalf so that Satan no longer can lay claim to our lives.
Great and good.

But what about when it feels like Satan is winning in the here and now? What about when he uses those bills we haven't paid to tell us that we are worthless dust, unworthy of God's love much less His help?

What about when Satan throws our past sins up in our face? "Yeah, you think you are so holy, but what about when you...?" From personal experience, he's good at this. He knows what we most fear. He knows what angers we harbor deep inside. He knows what we haven't forgiven, and he uses these things to eat away at us, pecking at us like chickens do a disabled chicken until it dies.

Finally, after many years of searching, I have found a weapon that combats Satan right where he's working. It's effective. It's easy. And best of all, it gets quick results.

It's remembering this phrase, "This is a reason to pray."

God drives Satan insane. In fact, Satan cannot be where God is. Better, Satan doesn't want to be where God is.

A friend of mine was having financial trouble. She had creditors calling who did not have a claim on the payment they were requesting, but that didn't stop them from calling-every day. At home, at work, on her cell phone. Despite getting solid legal advice that she did not owe this money, they kept calling. The situation was sending her into panic attacks and had anxiety wrapped over her like a wet blanket.

When she finally told me what was going on, as we talked, the Holy Spirit whispered the answer to me. "Tell her to use this as a reason to pray." Not in general terms, like at night saying, "Please, God. Take this away." But directly.

As crazy as this is going to sound, I have now seen the following work miracles not just in this situation but in others. When the thoughts come (or the creditor call comes in, or the angry co-worker shows up, or the ex-husband calls), in your spirit say, "Oh, thanks Satan. You're right. I need to pray about this. Bless you for reminding me... Thank You, God, for being in my life and for showing me Your best way to handle this. Be with me Holy Spirit. I give this situation to You. You are the most awesome friend I have! Thanks."

Let me tell you. Satan does NOT want to be the reason you remember God. Remember the dis- words mean separation, away from, negation. He wants to separate you from God, to negate the good God is doing in the world. It drives Satan crazy to be the reminder that God is present and all you have to do is put the situation in God's hands to handle. And it's become very clear to me that Satan will pull up stakes and RUN from a situation where you do this.

You can even get more specific in the salutation you use for the minions Satan has sent to torment you. "Oh, fear, thanks. You're right. I need to pray about this. Bless you for reminding me."

Oh! I can hear the demons cartwheeling away from the situation even as I write. They have no power where God is, and an aside, they hate to be blessed! It's quite fun actually because you are learning to spread love even to your enemies. You will feel better and more at peace before you ever even get to the point of beginning to handle whatever is going on.

"Oh, thanks, Satan. You're right I need to pray about this. Bless you for reminding me."

Use Satan as your reason to pray, and in no time, he won't be lurking around your doorstep. Try it. You'll see what I mean.

(For Reprints of Articles on Homeward Bound, visit: http://www.stacistallings.com/articlepermission.htm )

To Be Loved Or To Love

2006-09-12T09:35:00.000-07:00

© Staci Stallings

To Be Loved Or To Love

Recently I had to put into actual words something I've been living for the last couple of years. The occasion was a new Holy Spirit friend who felt bad because she hadn't paid for the meals we had shared together with another friend of mine. I laughed and told my new friend, "Hey, paying is relative with us. We don't keep track of who has paid how many times or who owes whom for what. We give, and the rest takes care of itself."

Shortly after this conversation I had cause to examine another common life situation-a friend who wants to be married but hasn't yet found Mr. Wonderful. I knew from talking with her that she had prayed for him to come into her life for years. As I thought about several inputs I'd been receiving from the Holy Spirit, however, it occurred to me to ask if she had ever thought to pray for him-as in for his well being, for his peace, for his joy. Praying for his benefit rather than for him to show up is very different.

As I thought about this, I started to ask, "Why? Why does that feel like such a monumental shift?" And the answer came: "It's the difference between wanting to be loved and wanting to love."

Wanting to be loved is about you. It's about how another can make you feel better, how they can help you, and about you wanting something you believe you do not have. It is literally taking. In a very real way wanting to be loved and striving to get someone to love you sap so much energy that no amount of love can ever fill void for very long.

Wanting to love on the other hand is expansive. You can give out as much love as is in your heart, and when you look back in it, there is more love to give. Loving creates more love. In fact, the only way to get more love is to love.

Some time ago I had a problem in that I needed someone to babysit my children while I went out on short notice. My regular babysitter couldn't do it. When I mentioned the problem to a friend, she immediately said, "I'll be right over." Another friend commented on how people are willing to drop whatever they are doing to come and help me, and why is that? I said, "Maybe because I've dropped everything to help them enough times."

But as I looked at this answer with the "be loved or to love" question in mind, I began to see a deeper dimension to this answer. You see, I don't drop everything to help someone else with the goal being that at some point I want to be paid back. In fact, I've often said if you expect so much as a thank you in return for a good deed, it's not a gift-it's a bribe. So I don't expect anything in return. I just love.

The remarkable thing is how often this love comes back to me at the times I most need it. For example, I recently came down with pneumonia. I felt terrible, but luckily, I was not put in the hospital. Instead, I was sent home to be with my three young kids. I made it through the day, but by evening I was exhausted.

My husband had a late meeting that night, so I was to be home with my kids all evening by myself. At about four, one of my friends called to see how I was doing. I explained what was going on, and she said, "I can't stay all evening, but I can come right now for awhile." She came and helped my daughter get through her homework assignments. Just after she left, a second friend called. She said, "All I need is a yes or no answer. I'm coming over. Do you need me to bring anything?"

Sure enough, I spent only 20 minutes that night by myself with the kids. Other than that, I got to rest. It's true I've spent many hours with each of these friends helping them with things, but the truth is I did that because I loved them, not because I wanted them to love me.

Funny thing though. In focusing my energy on loving them, I got loved in return. Hmmm....

~*~*~

Looking for more inspiration? Read the first three chapters of Staci's new book, "Cowboy" free! Go to: http://www.stacistallings.com/CowboyPreview.htm You'll feel better for the experience!

The Breaking Point

2006-09-08T07:30:00.000-07:00

© Staci Stallings

I cannot explain why this is exactly, but I know it to be true. God is giving me a crash course in breaking points. I don’t mean little breaking points like you broke a nail. I mean soul-crushing, gut-wrenching breaking points where you just scream out, “Why, God? Why? This is so unfair!”

There have been breaking points in my own family, in my friends, and in people I am just coming to know. Break downs, breaking hearts, broken lives… so many hurts, so much suffering that I can’t help but ask the Lord, “Why? Why would You allow this? Why? These are Your children whom You love in ways we cannot fathom, and yet You allow these things to happen. Why?”

As I have often written, many lessons in the physical realm are present, I believe, to explain things in a deeper, spiritual realm. Thus it is with a broken bone. Most people know that when a bone breaks and is reset, the healed part is stronger than the rest of the bone. The healing actually makes the bone stronger than before it was broken.

Does a broken bone hurt? As the owner of two previously broken bones, I can attest that the answer is: YES! Is it fun to have a broken bone? NO! Would I ever on my own understanding choose to have a broken bone? NO! And yet… And yet…

Life throws things at us, and if life is taking a rest, the world gets into the act. Disease, death, heartache, addiction, divorce, abuse, the suffering of loved ones, the pain of others that we can’t fix no matter how much we want to. All of these are very real. And all in one way or another point to something broken, something that needs healing, some point in us that needs to be turned over to Him because just like a broken bone, we cannot heal it. He has to.

I have heard it said that “God never gives us more than we can handle.” I’ve heard it, but I don’t believe it. I think God does, in fact, give us more than we on our own can handle. Because if we could handle it, what need would we have of going to Him? If we could handle it, why would we ever have cause to get to know Him on the deepest levels, those levels where no one else knows us, those levels where we often don’t even know ourselves? Those levels where our deepest fears reside. Those levels where our deepest sorrows lie.

As difficult as this sounds, I believe that like a good shepherd who will break the leg of a wandering sheep so that it will not get itself into more danger, God will in fact push us to the breaking point and then push once more so that we will break. Only when the bone is broken can it be healed and become stronger.

What needs broken in us the most? Our belief that we can do it. Our belief that we have to be “strong”. Our belief that these things He puts into our lives are somehow tests to see how strong we are. The reality is: He knows our breaking points—maybe better than we do. He knows the very things that will puncture our hearts so that we cry out to Him. He knows the things standing between Him and us, and He will break those things so that even in those areas we rely on Him.

Maybe our children are the one thing we cannot give over to Him. We feel responsible for them. We feel He gave them to us, and so we are to fix them to the best of our ability. And they break. They become willful. They leave the church. They go off the path. They run from His love and ours, and no matter what we try, we can’t seem to get them back on track.

It’s tough, but we have to learn to give them to God. Because what I can’t do. He can.

Maybe it’s our job or a co-worker. No matter what we try there is still angst and turmoil. Maybe it’s time to turn that over to God. It’s tough, but remember: I can’t. He can.

It sounds brutally cruel, but what I have found by walking with countless people through these breaking points is that it is only when they have hit bottom and found that all they had left was God, it was only there that they really found God.

Do I advocate having a breakdown simply so you can find God? No. But I think every little trial has the capacity to let us learn to lean on Him then, so that when the big trials come along we’re already in practice.

May the places you feel broken begin to be healed even in this very moment, and may you give over those places that feel as if they might break right now. He will heal them. More importantly, He will give you peace through the process. He knows what we most need, and what we most need is Him. That’s the lesson of every breaking point.

In-Spir-Ation

2006-09-05T22:00:00.000-07:00

© Staci Stallings

I am a word nut. I think I have been forever. I even have a favorite and a least favorite letter of the alphabet. So basically, I’m a little weird. I love words. I love how by combining just 26 letters in a myriad of ways, I can take the pictures in my brain and convey them to yours. To me, that’s cool.

Many times I have found myself fascinated by a word that I have used forever but suddenly understand in a different light. So one day I was thinking of words and deconstructing them to see what they literally meant. I had gone through a couple when out of the blue the Holy Spirit said, “Yeah, it’s like inspiration.” I said, “What?” And He said, “It’s like inspiration. Get it? In-spir-ation. Or literally being in the spirit.”

Wow! I had been giving the Holy Spirit credit for my writing for a lot of years. Do you really think I could come up with the line “A lie doesn’t understand truth anymore than fear understands faith”? No, way. That was totally from the Holy Spirit. However, I had been using the word inspiration like it just meant “uplifting” or “motivational.”

What I had failed to see until that very moment was how being in-spir-ed literally meant one moment when you were in the Spirit – or more literally He was in you.

So the next time you feel inspired by something, give credit where credit is due and realize you have just had a visitor come into your life. Look around; it might be happening more than you think!

(Reprint Article http://www.stacistallings.com/articlepermission.htm )

The Red Ribbon

2006-09-03T10:30:00.000-07:00

© Staci Stallings

Everyone wants a blue ribbon. Blue. First place. The best. Even kindergarteners want that blue ribbon. In sports, I was never a blue-ribbon person. In a race I was always last. In baseball I was as likely to get hit on the head as to drop the ball. In basketball I was fine as long as there weren’t nine other players on the court with me. Where I got my horrible sports ability, I don’t know, but I got it. And I got it early.

During the spring of my kindergarten year, our class had a fieldtrip to a park in a town about 20 miles away. Making that drive now is no big deal, but when you’re six and you’ve lived in a town of 300 all your life, going to a town of a couple thousand is a very big deal. Nonetheless, looking back now, I don’t remember much of that day. I’m sure we ate our little sack lunches, played on the swings, slid down the slide—typical six-year-old stuff. Then it was time for the races.

However, these were no ordinary races. Some parent had come up with the idea to have the picnic kind of races, like pass the potato under your neck and hold an egg on a spoon while you run to the other side. I don’t remember too much about these, but there was one race that will forever be lodged in my memory—the three-legged race.

The parents decided not to use potato sacks for this particular race. Instead, they tied our feet together. One lucky little boy got me for a partner. Now what you have to know about this little boy is that he was the second most athletic boy in our class. I’m sure he knew he was in trouble the second they laced his foot to mine. As for me, I was mortified. This guy was a winner. He almost always won, and I knew that, with me, he didn’t have a chance.

However, apparently he didn’t realize that as deeply as I did at the time. He laced his arm with mine, the gun sounded, and we were off to the other side. Couples were falling and stumbling all around us, but we stayed on our feet and made it to the other side. Unbelievably when we turned around and headed back for home, we were in the lead! Only one other couple even had a chance, and they were a good several yards behind us.

Then only feet from the finish line, disaster struck. I tripped and fell. We were close enough that my partner could have easily dragged me across the finish line and won. He could have, but he didn’t. Instead, he stopped, reached down, and helped me up—just as the other couple crossed the finish line.

I still remember that moment, and I still have that little red ribbon. When we graduated 13 years later, I stood on that stage and gave the Valedictory address to that same group of students, none of whom even remembered that moment anymore. So, I told them about that little boy who had made a split-second decision that helping a friend up was more important than winning a blue ribbon. In my speech I told them that I wouldn’t tell which of the guys sitting there on that stage was the little boy although he was up there with me. I wouldn’t tell because in truth at one time or another all of them had been that little boy—helping me up when I fell, taking time out from their pursuit of their own goals to help a fellow person in need.

And I told them why I’ve kept that ribbon. You see to me, that ribbon is a reminder that you don’t have to be a winner in the eyes of the world to be a winner to those closest to you. The world may judge you a failure or a success, but those closest to you will know the truth. That’s important to remember as we travel through this life.

You may not have a red ribbon to prove it, but I sincerely hope you have at least a few friends who remember you for taking time out from your pursuit of that blue ribbon to help them. I’m thinking those will be the ones that really count—I know it’s the one that counted the most to me.

*~*~*~
Come enjoy the inspiration! Visit Staci's site http://www.stacistallings.com You'll feel better for the experience!

Welcome to My Blog!

2004-08-22T17:13:00.000-07:00

Hello to all you weary Internet travelers. This is my first attempt at blogging so bear with me. I have a lot to say if I can ever get this figured out!

Peace to all as we travel on.